


Diplomacy and Bloodshed

by throwaway556



Category: Adventure Time
Genre: Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:28:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 29,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29010531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/throwaway556/pseuds/throwaway556
Summary: Post finale. After the humans arrive in Ooo, many kingdoms look forward to the opportunity. However, politics can be messy. A power competition between various kingdoms and an unexpected tragedy spawn out of the human's arrival.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	1. The Human Settlement

It was a cool morning on a calm cloudy day. Diplomats, princesses, and distinguished guests anxiously waited outside of the metal gates of the recently constructed human settlement. With the exceptions of two individuals -Finn and Simon- no outsider had been allowed in. Both had been hard pressed for information. What were the humans like? What were their intentions? Would their settlement be open to trade or alliances? In truth, most of this information was unknown to them. What they did know was protected under agreements of confidentiality. No matter how often they were probed or how many times they explained their circumstances, the same people would continue asking the same questions. This afternoon was slightly different. Now was the last attempt for any kingdom or individual to gain an advantage. The pair were hounded by every invited guest for some sort of glimpse into the fledgling settlement's mindset. Simon was lucky enough to be saved when Marceline flew him high into the air, but Finn was left out to dry. Normally, Jake would have just stretched him to a similar level of safety, but the dog had been snuffed of an invitation. For the time being, Finn was literally up against the wall. Many voices spat questions into his direction. He couldn’t keep track of who asked what. Some questions were fair, others not so much.  
“Will the humans want to trade for food?”  
“Do the humans plan to expand into new territories?”  
Finn was content on letting the guests wear themselves out. Their voices would die eventually.  
“Will the humans want to marry into other kingdoms?”  
“Will the humans be open to a military alliance?”  
“Can the humans share their medical advancements?”  
“Are human guys hot?”  
Finn silently pled that whoever was on the other side of the gate would just open it a crack and yank him into it.  
“What if the humans cause disruption to the surrounding areas?”  
“Who is going to be in charge of the humans?”  
“What is human culture like?”  
“Do all humans wear those dumb hats?”  
“Are humans really as dumb as the books make them out to be?”  
Finn shut his eyes and let the endless barrage of questions continue. He no longer made the effort to separate each voice, and allowed for each question to become background noise.  
Suddenly, a hand reached onto his shoulder. Not in a forceful or tugging motion, but in a supportive one. Finn opened his eyes and saw pink.  
“Hey PB. Wondered when I would run into you.”  
“Hey Finn. I can see you’re busy getting shouted at.”  
The cacophony of the other guests really did become background noise now. While the crowd desperately competing for his attention certainly had friendly faces, Bubblegum’s always stood out.  
“Yeah. Everyone seems to want to know something. I get it, I really do. But I just can’t answer them. So much of it is political stuff that I don’t know about. I can’t really speak for the humans.”  
“That’s a shame. I really wanted to see if you could help foster ties between the humans and the candy kingdom before any other agreements were made.”  
“Oh, PB not you too.”  
“Relax Finn, I’m only half serious. I understand the position you’re being put in. Plus, I know how you feel about formal diplomacy.”  
“Yeah. I’m happy to help with establishing good ties between the humans and everyone else, but the humans will have their own government and representatives. Besides, Simon would be a lot better at all that political stuff if it came down to it.”  
“All true. But unlike Simon, you’ve set a strong precedent for the humans over the past eighteen years plus you survived in Ooo as a human. I think that gives you more than enough qualification for any position you want with them.”  
“That’s true. And I’m more than happy to help them adjust. But everyone here is treating me like I’m some sort of expert on humans. I barely know these people. They don’t act like me, and they certainly don’t think like me.”  
“Again, all true. But, you’re really the only available expert on humans. Marceline has already made clear that anyone who bothers Simon will be bothering her. And from what he’s told me, he doesn’t really feel connected with the humans anymore since he’s not aging.”  
“Yeah, he really does get the shortest end of the stick no matter the situation. First, he lost Betty, and now he’ll have to watch all the new people he meets fade away. At least he has you and Marceline for company.”  
“His situation really is heartbreaking, isn’t it?”  
The massive metal doors began to groan before splitting apart. Each guest took quick notice and tried to push their way to the front while trying to make themselves as presentable as possible. Even Bubblegum dusted herself off and stood up tall. With the bombardment of questions finally ended, Marceline descended next to Bubblegum and allowed Simon to climb off of her back. Finn turned around and joined the rest of the crowd in facing the figure coming out to greet everyone.  
A short, ancient-looking man robed entirely in green was bobbing his way towards them. Walking stick in hand, he gradually made his way out of the gate. Behind him was a slightly younger-looking blond woman, and two much larger men who were carrying a soap box, and a wooden podium. Swiftly, the podium was setup. The larger two men backed away, while the older man took his place on top of the box. The woman hesitated, but silently moved next to Finn’s group. Despite his physical appearance, his voice exploded with youthful energy.  
“Hello princesses, diplomats, heroes, and distinguished guests. I am proud to welcome you to New Hope. I am sure you are all buzzing with anticipation for your questions. Rest assured, they will all be addressed. I am elder Marc, named in the honor of the ancient protector of the human’s in our most dire hour…”  
Marceline playfully poked Simon.  
“How much of a shocker do you think I’ll give them after I tell them who I am?”  
“What makes you think I didn’t already tell them you were coming?”  
“Oh, I’m so gonna get it later if you did.”  
“Don’t worry, I didn’t spoil your fun. I thought you would want to make your usual grand entrance.”  
A shrill voice from the crowd interrupted the opening ceremony.  
“Elder Marc, my name advisor Uncouth. I come representing the far-away mining kingdom. I just so happen to know that your ancient protector is in this very crowd!”  
Marceline’s head snapped to the direction of the shrill voiced man. He was humanoid, but made of stone. His clothing was purple and gold, and he was covered in excessively lavish decoration from head to foot stub. But worst of all, she had no idea who this punk was. If Simon had told them, she would have picked him up while invisible, or ruffle his hair and fly away with his glasses for a minute. This guy not only just ruined her introduction, but had the audacity to try and use her for political gain. Before she moved to do anything to him, elder Marc resumed.  
“Yes, I was made aware of our hero’s presence today from our guide of the land Finn. Your attempt to help is appreciated, but your attempt to use our hero for political gain is not. We will require a different representative from the mining kingdom to conduct any future diplomacy.”  
“But- “  
“Please leave. The faster your replacement arrives, the sooner your kingdom will be able to have meaningful relations with human-kind. And if your kingdom is indeed far away, that may take a while.”  
At a loss for words, the advisor awkwardly separated from the crowd and began to run. A well-aimed rock to the back of the head formally introduced his face to the ground. Elder Marc waited until he was out of sight to continue.  
“Apologies for the interruption. We have a distaste for political brownnosing, especially when it attempts to use our culture as a bargaining chip. I’m sure you all understand. In any case, I am sure that everyone here is anxious to see the inside of the settlement. We will split the crowd to be guided by our town’s helpers, the Minerva bots. Afterwards, we will meet to celebrate in the hopes of positive relations between the humans and each of your kingdoms. And yes, you shall each receive the same information on your tours.”  
New Minerva bots emerged from the gate and began directing visiting dignitaries to follow them. Eventually, Finn, Simon, Marceline, and Bubblegum were left with elder Marc still on the podium, and the Minerva bot that had joined them before. Slowly, the elder approached the group.


	2. Much Needed Conversations

“It is my pleasure to formally welcome each of you to our settlement.”  
The elder began to walk to each member of the group and greeted them individually.  
“Finn. I so very much appreciate the help you have given us thus far, and hope it will continue far into the future.”  
“No problem Marc. Happy to help.”  
“Princess Bubblegum of the Candy Kingdom. It is an honor to finally meet you. Finn has told me much, and I believe a close partnership between our nascent settlement and your majestic kingdom would be mutually beneficial.”  
“It is an honor to meet you as well. And I whole-heartedly agree. Exchanging technologies and signing a mutual defense treaty are two of my highest priorities, but we can discuss matters of state later.”  
“Great protector Marceline. I am truly humbled to be in your presence. I cannot express the gratitude human-kind has for you. Between Finn and our recorded history, I feel like I know a lot about you. But nevertheless, I hope to get to know you from a first-hand perspective.”  
“Thank you. I was kind of hoping to surprise everyone by showing up. But this is okay, I guess. I will have to get Finn back for talking behind my back.”  
“You- you’re kidding Marceline. Right? Marceline?”  
“And Dr. Petrikov. You have been a bit taciturn, but have continued to offer your aid as well as insights to our history and development as a race at every turn. Some of the books you have provided us have proved especially helpful with our defense research. And pardon me, but I must ask. Finn mentioned you raised our great protector when she was a child. How could this be true?  
“Thank you, and you can call me Simon. I apologize if I’ve seemed reserved. I’m adjusting to recent major changes in my life. As for your question, I may not look it but I’m over one thousand years old. Although I don’t feel it appropriate to claim that I raised Marceline—”  
Marceline wrapped Simon into a playful headlock.  
“Don’t mind him. Simon’s a modest guy.”  
“I see. Well, I would be happy to give a tour of the settlement to your group – although Finn and Simon have already seen parts of it, I suppose.”  
“Actually, I was hoping if I could spend some time with my mom-bot here. There’s something I’d like speak with her about.”  
“Simon and I will catch up with you. And I hope to see myself on a statue or in a book or your art or something.”  
“I, for one, would be delighted to go on a tour with you elder Marc. We could speak more about establishing long-lasting bonds between our peoples.”  
“Very well. I will escort the Princess to our research and development facilities. I’m sure you will all manage to find us when your business concludes.”  
Elder Marc and Bubblegum turned and walked into the settlement. Their voices and figures grew faint, and eventually vanished. They were soon followed by Marceline and Simon, who made sure to go in the opposite direction.  
“Everything okay Finn?”  
“Yeah, I guess. I’m just not sure what I can or should be doing at this point. I want to help the humans, but I don’t really know what my role is now. I don’t live with you, but I’m always going to be associated with the settlement.”  
“Finn, you’ve already helped us so much. You’ve served as an ambassador for us since you were born. You’ve introduced so many foreign kingdoms to the possibility of working with us. You even introduced the possibility of returning to Ooo to our people on the island. None of this would have been possible if it weren’t for you.”  
“Oh, I don’t know about that…”  
“Are you kidding? You think all of those princesses and diplomats would be here and willing to work and trade with us if you hadn’t been such a good role model for us? A bunch of those kingdoms would have probably attacked us if they didn’t have positive perceptions of humans- perceptions that came from their experience with you!”  
“I guess I never thought about it that way.”  
“And like I said, we were all terrified of leaving the island— I know I was. But you proved that it was safe and worthwhile. I don’t think you need to pout about being unsure what to do to help. Just keep being you. If anything, I’m sure elder Marc or any members of the council have ideas of what you could help with— if you wanted to that is.”  
“Of course, I want to help. I’m just not used to formal diplomacy or any of that. Sure, I served as a good example, but I wasn’t trying to represent humans. And I didn’t feel any pressure to represent them either. Now I’m just thinking that I’m going to be seen as a representation whether I want to be or not.”  
“I see what you mean. But I don’t think you have anything to worry about, honestly. Here, maybe if we go get some ice cream you’ll cheer up. You can even meet some of the locals. A lot of them already look up to you, and I’m sure they’ll want to learn as much as they can about Ooo.”  
“Wait a minute! I know how I can help more! I can teach classes about living and surviving in Ooo.”  
“That would be wonderful.”  
“Yeah, I could teach about the different monsters and dungeons. I could teach about the different kingdoms and how to get to them. I can even teach sword-fighting and fighting technique classes!”  
“Let’s start slowly. I’m sure there will be interest for all of those things, but we can’t rush into them.”  
“You’re right. Let’s go get that ice cream.”

When they reached the ocean, Marceline finally stopped. She needed to get away from everyone for a bit, especially for the conversation she wanted to have. She gently set Simon down and sat down next to him in the shade. For a couple of minutes, neither said anything. Finally, Simon disrupted the silence.  
“So, what’s on your mind Marcy?”  
“Honestly, I was only joking about introducing myself to the humans. Don’t get me wrong, I’m stoked they remember me. But I’m also kind of nervous. I feel like they may have idolized me, and I doubt I’ll live up to any expectations they have.”  
“I’m sure they’re excited to have you here. I can’t imagine the faces people made when Finn mentioned you were alive and kicking.”  
She smiled, but couldn’t shake the feeling.  
“Yeah, I’m sure they are excited for now. But I’m not sure how much they know. I don’t even know if they’re aware that I’m a vampire. Not to mention, my personality has certainly changed since I interacted with them. And if they want answers to stuff like what was your motivation for protecting us, or what were the people back then like, I know that I can’t give them honest ones.”  
“You protected the last remaining humans from extinction. They’ll understand and appreciate anything you have to say to them, and they certainly won’t expect you to have the same personality anymore.”  
“Simon, you were still the Ice King when I told you this. But my motivation for protecting the humans and hunting the vampires was you. I protected them because it felt like I was protecting you. Sure, I grew attached to a couple of them, but in complete honesty I can barely remember their names, much less their personalities. I can’t tell them any of that.”  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know—”  
“And what was that about not raising me? I seem to recall you taking care of me for eight years. Not to mention teaching me to read, write, cook, survive, and countless other things. Heck, I inherited my entire moral code from you!”  
Simon silent stared down at his hands and waited for Marceline to continue. Marceline began to tear up.  
“I used to say that I lost my moral code. I said that because I had to watch what happened to you. You forgot everything you taught me. You forgot me! You were my example of good and selflessness in the world. You sacrificed everything to help and take care of me. And the world rewarded you with one thousand years of insanity, cruelty, and suffering. I-I didn’t know what to do or how to act anymore after that. Everything seemed so pointless.”  
“Marceline I’m so sorry.”  
“Simon you don’t have to apologize.”  
“I do. I said that because I felt- feel guilty. I left you when you still needed me. It was the hardest and most painful thing I’ve ever done, and I don’t think I can ever forgive myself for doing that to you. I thought I was a threat to you, but that hardly justifies it. I thought that summoning your dad to take care of you would be the best way to keep you safe, but that only made things worse for you. Heck, it probably put you in more danger. I barely left you a proper explanation, and I’m sure you resented me for the longest time. It’s a miracle that in my manic state I brought a proper apology to you. I- “  
Simon was pulled into a bone-crushing hug. He tried to squeeze her with an equal amount of strength to no avail. Tears made their way down his face and landed across his suit. They were joined by the free-falling tears of the girl holding him.  
“Simon for a long time I didn’t know what was going on. I knew there was a problem because of the crown, but I only started to understand it when I found that apology and learned how much you were suffering- when you were taking care of me and for the thousand years after. And even before that I never resented or hated you. I missed you and more than anything and just wanted you back.”  
“Marcy…”  
“I know you meant to compliment me by saying I raised myself, but I didn’t. You did. Instead, what you said today hurt me to my core. I know I haven’t said this to you in a long time, but I love you.”  
“I love you too Marceline.”  
“There’s something else. When I was a little girl, I never said it because I hoped to eventually meet my dad. But when I finally did meet him, he turned out to be one of the most self-obsessed jerks ever. Simon, I know I call him dad out of habit, but when I picture what a parent is supposed to be and do, I think of you. I don’t know if you think of me as your daughter, and its fine if you don’t. But to me, you’re always going to be my real dad.”  
For a minute, Simon sat awestruck. He collected himself and mustered all of his strength in order to speak clearly.  
“Marceline I can’t express how happy I am to hear those words from you. I never wanted to overstep my bounds with you. But ever since I met you, I’ve thought of you as my daughter. I never wanted to mention it because I was terrified. Terrified of isolating you, of being rejected by you, of you hating me for leaving you. I can’t begin to apologize for what I’ve put you through over the past millennium. But I can start trying to make up by treating you however you would like me to.”  
“Can you do one more thing for me?”  
“Of course.”  
“I need you to forgive yourself for everything. If I can do it, so can you.”  
“I’ll try.”  
Marceline gently wrapped her arms around him, which Simon quickly returned. For another minute, the pair sat in each-other’s arms and let themselves cry. Then, they rose.  
“It’s a good thing no one else is on this beach right now. Otherwise they would have seen their great protector crying.”  
She playfully punched him in the arm.  
“Marcy, are you really nervous about what the people in this settlement will think when they meet you?”  
“No. Not anymore. I don’t plan on introducing myself or anything now. But if it happens, I’ll tell them the truth. And if they don’t like it, or if they don’t like me, too bad for them.”  
“Sounds like a good plan.”  
“Come on. Let’s go meet up with Bonnie and Marc.”  
Simon started walking only for Marceline to lift him by the waist and fly into the settlement.  
“I’m perfectly fine walking Marcy.”  
“I seem to recall you telling me about one thousand years ago that if someone offered to carry you, that you’d take it in a heartbeat. Well newsflash for you Simon, I’m offering to fly you, and you can’t say no.”  
“Okay, you win.” Simon chuckled.


	3. Unsettling Discoveries

Elder Marc and Bubblegum were finishing their tour of the human settlement's facility of security and defense research. Ahead of them were a swarm of other princesses each looking like they would rather be anywhere else in the world.  
“And here is where we are testing anti-magic and magical reflection technologies. We hope to find a way to synthesize any developments into our existing infrastructure. Of course, we would be willing to share the technology as well.”  
“This is all fascinating. Human technology is miles ahead of almost all of the other kingdoms in Ooo. But I have to ask, why are you pouring so many resources into defense?” Surely it isn’t all necessary?”  
“Well princess, the unfortunate truth of the matter is that we don’t know what is and what isn’t necessary. The last time we were on this continent, we were hunted down. We were only saved by the grace of the great protector. We had no way to fight back. And when we arrived on the islands, we lived in constant fear of the outside world. We built a giant guardian to defend us that ironically kept us prisoners. We don’t want to live like that anymore. We want to be capable of defending ourselves.”  
“I understand. The safety of my peoples is my paramount concern as well. But still, most of the research and scientific advancements of the candy kingdom is go into other sectors.”  
“That may be true Princess, and you’ll have to forgive the humans of being paranoid. We came here knowing very little about the land or its inhabitants. Our initial arrival sparked curiosity and hopes for friendship, but also the ire of neighboring communities and kingdoms. We’ve already had to defend ourselves from armies of raiders and pillagers multiple times. We’ve even been bullied into giving tribute to nearby kingdoms and monsters. We know that investing so heavily in defense may look startling, especially to the long-existing kingdoms of Ooo, but the fact of the matter is that your kingdom and so many others already have stability and recognized legitimacy. We do not.”  
“I didn’t think of it that way. You’re right. Its been a long time since I’ve had to invest heavily into my defense. Sure, there have been conflicts, but nothing that my kingdom wasn’t prepared for. We have allies, soldiers, and heroes to help defend us. I just hope the other kingdoms will see your situation like I do.”  
“Thank you, princess. I’m sure that the other princesses and gathered diplomats will be as open-minded and supportive as you are.”  
“We’ll see.”  
A collective gasp was heard from the crowd of guests further down the corridor. Screams of anger filled the halls of the research facility. Bubblegum and Marc hurried down the hallway. They quickly found themselves into a room labeled older technology. A Minerva bot was trying to calm down her tour group to no avail. Breakfast princess, Diamond princess, Ghost Princess II, and Marlo, a representative of Wizard City were rallying the others.  
“Please calm down. I can explain everything.”  
“Explain? Diamond Princess scoffed. There’s nothing to explain! You have tools that can cut through my kingdom’s defenses like butter!”  
“I assure you; this technology was developed several hundred years ago. It was for making jewelry.”  
“That’s supposed to make me feel better?! All you’re saying is that you’re even more capable now!”  
“Please we would never take an offensive initiative.”  
“Right, that’s why you’re developing so much anti-magic tech. You have something against wizards? Cuz I got news for ya, wizards rule fool!” Marlo butted in.  
“The anti-magic technology is for our defense. I explained to you that a sorceress threatened to turn us into various animals if we didn’t give her gold and silver.”  
“Right and it just so happens that you’re working on negating magic all together. What’s stopping you from just invading us?”  
“We don’t even know where Wizard City is. And we have no reason to invade- “  
“Oh what, we’re not good enough for the mighty humans to invade?”  
“What? That’s not what I said—”  
“You heard it here fools! She admits the humans want to invade!”  
“QUIET!” 

Bubblegum’s outburst caught the squabbling crowd by surprise. Breakfast Princess was first to recover.  
“What a surprise, Bubblegum the dictator taking the side of the humans. She probably wants a trade deal for their military advancements to further expand her rule. She probably wants to make a deal to split the continent between the candy and human empires!”  
Other members of the group began nodding their heads in agreement. Breakfast Princess noticed she had gained the reins of the crowd, and had no intention of putting them down.  
“What? I’m no dictator! And I’m not trying to make any such deal!”  
“That’s exactly what she would say! And you all have seen how she acts, and how strong the candy kingdom is becoming!”  
“What are you even talking about right now?!”  
"I've seen what you're doing! Fostering closer relations with Lumpy Space through your Earl. Trying to make a close connection with the humans as soon as they open up. Not to mention your many recent trips into the Mountain Kingdom.  
Bubblegum's face turned red at the mention of Marceline's home. Was she really trying to convince these people her relationship with Marceline was just politics?  
"If you have something to say, you can say it to my face right here, right now!"  
“I don’t need to explain myself to you. Come on everyone. I think we’ve seen enough. We need to start telling the other kingdoms about all of this.”  
The majority of the princesses and official representatives shuffled past Bubblegum and Marc. Bubblegum stuck out her tongue at them behind their backs. The Minerva bot was left almost alone in the room dejected, but not surprised. The only others remaining in the room were Flame Princess and Ninja Princess. It was Marc who spoke first.

“Well. I can’t say I didn’t fear this outcome. And I believe I owe you an apology Princess Bubblegum. You didn’t outright say it, but your tone of voice earlier should have told me the others may not be so understanding of the human’s current circumstances.”  
“Its ok elder Marc. If anything, I’m be the one who should be sorry. Some of the other princesses are paranoid, and I have a bit of an unearned reputation for being draconian.”  
“A little? PB you used to regularly sneak behind the backs of other kingdoms, even your allies! And you could never really explain yourself either. For the fire kingdom I get it, we had potential instabilities. But you didn’t use diplomacy to explain your concerns, you used secrecy to address them yourself!”  
“FP is right. I might be the ninja Princess, but you have mastered the art of moving in the political shadows. No wonder Breakfast Princess is skeptical. Just seeing you and the elder together probably got her scared.”  
“Not to mention, you are known to be pretty harsh. Bubblegum, you yourself are way older than almost all of the kingdoms. There have always been rumors of what you’ve done to opposing forces, even in your own kingdom.”  
“Ok that’s enough, I get it. Thank you both, really. I didn’t know how defense focused the humans were, and I didn’t think any perceptions of me could have an adverse effect on a potential relationship with them. But right now, I need to know where the Fire and Ninja kingdoms stand. What do you two think about candy-human relations?  
“The Fire kingdom is your ally PB. We stand by you, and I was already planning to stand by the humans.”  
“The Ninja kingdom has been neutral and wishes to remain so, but we will come to either of your aids diplomatically and if worse comes to worst, militarily.”  
Marc tapped his walking stick to gain everyone’s attention.  
“I thank you for your offers of support. I explained to Bubblegum that the humans have been through a lot of struggles in our history, including recently. I thought the Minerva bots could express our concerns and that the other kingdoms would understand. But it seems it was a foolish notion.”  
“Its ok little man. The Fire kingdom understands what its like to be at the mercy of others in an unknown world. Just don’t go developing anything that can drown out my kingdom.”  
“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

The group began to exit the facility. Bubblegum walked slightly behind the rest thinking to herself.  
"I guess it does look a bit shady. Having a citizen dating the new Queen of Lump Space. Not to mention I'm dating a one woman army who just happens to be in charge of the Mountain Kingdom. Do I really appear to them as just caring about politics?..."

Marceline and Simon had made it to the settlement’s main plaza. She had finally decided to put him down and walk besides him after the pair received an adequate number of stares and dumbfounded looks. In the distance, slogans were chanted and bells rung. Simon looked in their direction, but Marceline didn’t seem to take notice. After staring a bit, Simon turned his attention to Marceline.  
“Where do you think Bubblegum and elder Marc have wondered off Marcy?”  
“Knowing Bonnie, she probably asked to go see the nerd stuff the second she spotted it. Maybe we could ask around?”  
“Maybe one of the Minerva bots knows something. In fact, I see one now watching a certain friend of ours eating some ice cream.”  
Simon and Marceline made their way to an almost empty ice cream parlor. Finn was munching away at his snack and hadn’t noticed the pair.  
“Psst. Simon watch this.”  
Marceline turned invisible. She floated above Finn and waited. He continued finishing the bowl of ice cream until a single bite remained. He had been saving this part for last. A delicious looking chocolate vanilla mix with a strawberry in the middle. He moved his spoon to dig down, only for the bowl to shift slightly to the left at the last second.  
“Oh, what?!”  
Finn tried again. This time the bowl shifted to the right.  
“Ok if that’s how it’s gonna be.”  
Finn used his metal arm to hold the bowl in place. He hungrily lunged for it, only for the spoon to stop mid-dive.  
“Aw come on!”  
The strawberry was rose from the ice cream mix and was drained of its red before being tossed aside.  
“I should have known. Marcy come on I was looking forward to that.”  
Marceline laughed. She materialized above him drying her eyes.  
“Ah you should have seen the look on your face when I first moved the bowl. It was priceless.”  
Simon carried himself over to the table but didn’t sit down.  
“Hello all, hope you’ve had an interesting time so far.”  
“Its been great getting to show Finn around the settlement. I’m sure you and Marceline have had a great time exploring as well.”  
“Yeah Marcy, have you found any references of your past yet? You know, not in my ice cream that is.”  
“Nah, we haven’t really been looking for them. We’ve mostly been observing the beach and narrow streets. We actually just got to the main plaza while looking to find Bonnie.”  
“Oh yeah, we should probably all meet up. I’m sure she elder Marc has shown her all around by now.”  
“Hey, um Minerva can I ask you a question- actually two of them?”  
“Of course, Simon.”  
“Why is this street so empty today? Wouldn’t it make sense for all of these businesses to be open now?”  
“I think mostly everyone in the colony is working on this afternoon’s celebration in some way.”  
“Uh-huh, that’s what I thought. So, my next question is what about that group with the signs and bells over there?”  
Minerva sighed and pouted. This was a question she had been expecting all day. In a way, she was glad it was Simon who asked it- and for it to be asked so far away from the other visiting dignitaries.  
“Those are the isolationists. They don’t want the settlement to have any contact with other kingdoms. They’re afraid we’ll be drawn into wars or needless diplomatic engagements.”  
“But you and the vast majority of others don’t agree with them?”  
“No. Everyone else believes we need to engage with the other nations. For diplomacy, safety, food, technology, medicine, and everything else. You and Finn already know we’ve been targeted by nearby communities in the past. Closing ourselves off will just make us an easier target for them until we have our defenses properly running.”  
“Who has been messing with you guys M? I don’t mind knocking sense into some skulls.”  
“The sentiment is appreciated Marceline, but I don’t think violence alone will resolve it. We need some sort of treaty that guarantees our place – all of our places – here together. Foreign support would be nice, but it needs to be diplomatic. It can’t be we have a vampire queen who is going to just beat you all into submission, although I admit that would be funny to watch.”  
The group looked in the direction of the isolationists. Bells continued to clammer and odd sounding slogans were shouted in unison. The isolationists didn’t move from their designated protest areas. They were frantic and chaotic in their movements, but for the moment were cowed by the seeker turned police force watching over them.  
“Do you think they’re dangerous M?”  
“I don’t know. They tore up a store or two last week in protest of this event, but no one was hurt then. I think they’re scared more than anything. But that doesn’t justify anything they’ve been saying or threatening.”  
“Threats? Mom you didn’t say anything about threats!”  
“I don’t think they’re substantiated. They claimed they had the ability to hurt our future relations forever. As you can see, they don’t really have the numbers to try anything. Nor do they have the political influence to do anything.”  
The group fell silent for a moment. Finn looked to everyone’s faces. His mom and Marceline had neutral expressions. They weren’t very concerned about this group’s capabilities. Simon, however, was deep in thought. He tried to maintain a façade of indifference, but his eyes betrayed him. There was worry.  
“Let’s go find Bubblegum and elder Marc. Minerva do you know where they may be?”  
“They’re finishing up at our military research facility. One of my other bots recorded an unpleasant exchange between some of the other guests and the princess. I can guide you there now.”  
“Lead the way mom.”  
As they walked to the facility, Finn slowed to match Simon’s pace.  
“Simon what were you thinking at the parlor?”  
“It’s probably nothing Finn.”  
“If its anything, you should tell me. We can figure it out.”  
Simon gave out a tired sigh but nodded his head.  
“I think Minerva is underestimating them. Ideologies can be very dangerous- even more so in small groups. I know I’m the only one who really knows about them, but some of the most dangerous groups and insurgents in human history started and remained very small. It doesn’t take a lot of resources, or people for that matter, to do something that changes the future forever.”  
Finn stopped and thought for a moment.  
“I get what you’re saying Simon. I think you’re right. These guys could cause some major trouble. But we won’t let that happen.”  
“I’m glad to hear your confidence Finn.”  
“Also, I have an embarrassing question if you don’t mind.”  
“Go for it.”  
“I don’t know what an insurgent is.”


	4. Division

Minerva led the group towards the research facility. Finn kept pace with his mom while Simon and Marceline walked at a slower stride. As they grew nearer, the group began to here shouts and cries of anger.   
“Mom, I thought you said those isolationists were contained near the main plaza.”  
“They are. These voices aren’t in my database. They must be some of the guests we’re hosting today.”  
“What? Why would any of the princesses or other guests be this angry?”  
Finn got his answer as he turned the corner. The sight made him stop dead in his tracks. Princesses, diplomats, and other guests were divided into two larger factions. The left and much more populated side was being worked into a frenzy by Breakfast Princess. Between the two arguing factions rested multiple Minerva bots with their arms outstretched. Those gathered on the opposite of the side of the bots had no clear leader, but had multiple familiar faces. Among them, Bubblegum, Flame Princess, Turtle Princess, Slime Princess, and elder Marc.  
As Finn stared, he was suddenly knocked forward, but managed to catch himself.  
“Whoops, sorry Finn. But why were you—”  
Marceline’s voice died after glimpsing the site. She flew directly to Bubblegum’s side.  
“Bonnie what’s going on here? Did something happen?”  
“Yeah. A bunch of the others have taken issue with the settlement’s research into defense technologies. They think the humans will try to use them to attack other kingdoms if they’re not stopped right now. Plus, they think that there is some sort of secret deal between the humans and a handful of other kingdoms, mine included.”  
“What? That’s crazy. I’ll go talk some sense into them. Just tell me who to find.”  
“You won’t be able to Marcy; they won’t listen to you. I don’t think they’ll listen to any of us.”   
“Are you kidding? I get people to listen to me all the time. Heck, they’ll be more willing since I’m not involved in any of this political biz.”  
“That’s just it. Breakfast Princess and a couple of others have convinced them all that you are involved. They think our relationship is just some sort of political front for power.”  
“That’s insane. Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t care about any of that stuff. I just make sure the mountain kingdom is protected from bandits and not starving!”   
“Yeah, well they all know me too. And apparently, if I’m involved with something then there is an ulterior motive. Marceline most of the other’s don’t trust me anymore. And after thinking about it, I can’t blame them. I’m like some kind of puppet-master.”  
“Bonnie you know that isn’t true. Please don’t get upset. They’re all just being meatheads. Hey. I bet they’re all just jealous of your awesome kingdom and that the humans want you to be their closest ally.”  
The two paused and looked into each other’s eyes. Bubblegum planted a quick peck on Marceline’s cheek.   
“Thanks Marcy. I know I shouldn’t let that stuff get to my head. It usually doesn’t. Its just that seeing all of this happening and not being able to explain myself—”  
“I get it Peebs. You’re stressed. It happens to all of us. Even you.”  
“So, where’s everyone else? I can’t imagine you leaving Simon in this mess for more than a minute.”  
“Simon and the others are just across the street keeping their distance.”  
The two were interrupted by screeches of anger. Someone had thrown a chunk of wood at Turtle Princess. Luckily for her, Flame Princess intercepted it. Unfortunately for everyone, she retaliated with a small fire ball. Breakfast Princess cried foul.  
“See look at this! Someone absent mindedly tosses a piece of wood, and they retaliate by trying to set us on fire! They’re not even hiding it anymore!”  
The crowd on the left grew quiet wanting to hear instruction of what they could do. Their disorganized yelling dying into murmurs before the crowd fell completely silent. Marlo walked to the front of the crowd and stood beside Breakfast Princess. Elder Marc used the opportunity to slip away in Finn’s direction.   
“Hear me princesses and diplomats of Ooo. For we must come together to prevent this rogue faction from threatening to overtake everything we hold dear!” Breakfast Princess began.  
Marlo slipped her a couple of notes from under his sleeve. He turned around and glared at Bubblegum and Marceline before turning his attention back to the mesmerized crowd.  
“Today many of us have seen the potential threat the humans pose to our individual kingdoms. They have weaponry that destroys the toughest of substances, that negates the strongest of magic, and that renders many of our castles as irrelevant! But far worse than that, is the threat of another entity. One which seeks to join with the humans to take over all of our kingdoms! That means no more princess days, no more fancy clothes, no more sovereignty over our own lands, or anything else that comes with being a princess!”  
The crowd cheered. Marceline rolled her eyes.   
“Can you believe their falling for this junk Peebs?”  
She received no response. She looked over and saw Bubblegum terrified. She knew that face. It was the face Bubblegum made when she was thinking of thousands of theoretical possibilities, all of them bad. Marceline glanced at the other people on her side. Flame and Ninja princess had their arms crossed in defiance. Slime Princess was staring at the ground. The Duke of Nuts held his hands over his mouth. Turtle Princess’s face was contorted into a mix of concern and attempted indifference. Aunt Lolly was wiping her forehead with a tissue. Various diplomats were hastily writing every word down. Marceline turned her head back to the crowd as Breakfast Princess continued.  
“The Candy kingdom has become- how do I pronounce this word Marlo?”  
“Pervasive.”  
“Pervasive in its efforts to expand its influence. Their exploits are countless. They include pushing the new Lumpy Space Queen into the arms of one of her Earls! Making peace, and forming a strong bond with the second candy kingdom! Weakening the Flame Kingdom’s military might, once a nation that could properly challenge them in combat, and then forming a defense pact with them! She received a private tour of all of the research facilities in the settlement by one of its elders! She might have secret knowledge that we’ve been denied! She has even formed an intimate alliance with the mountain kingdom which she may one day seek to unite through marriage! She has forced trade deals on her neighbors, forcefully conscripted villagers and youths to serve it, and continues to act high and mighty towards the rest of us! This needs to end now!”  
The crowd cheered. Breakfast Princess moved out of the spotlight and allowed Marlo to take over.  
“Princess Bubblegum has slighted many of us here. She has ruined the sanctity of my beloved Wizard City and has insulted every one of its citizens. She has constantly treated many of you as lesser princesses, as lesser people! She forbids her own citizens, save the upper echelon of candy society, from having any meaningful impact on her rule! The only time they did have an impact, she overthrew the person they elected!” It is our duty to draw a line here and now. We as a continent must come together and prevent a signing of a human-candy alliance. Any treaty would lead to an accelerated proliferation of advanced technologies in the two strongest kingdoms! It would assure our downfall and enslavement!  
“Man, I see who holds the speech writing pen in this relationship, right Bonnie?”  
Bubblegum didn’t respond. Marceline looked at her, and followed her eyes. Slime Princess had left their faction and joined the opposition. Bubblegum screamed.  
“Slime Princess what do you think you’re doing! The Candy and Slime kingdoms have always been historic allies! I helped write your constitution when your kingdom was founded!”  
Slime Princess offered no response. Instead, she addressed the crowd.  
“Princess Bubblegum is a very jealous and controlling person. She got jealous of my slime powers, and she tries to control her friends and allies every time she can. I can no longer stand with her now that my eyes have been opened to her true intentions.”  
Bubblegum saw red. She wanted to scream, to kick, and to bite. But she didn’t. She breathed and began walking in the opposite direction. She was done with this mess. The others on her side soon followed suit.  
Elder Marc reached Finn and Simon. He took a moment to catch his breath and then explained the situation. After hearing him out, Finn started.  
“Do you think the isolationists have anything to do with this?”  
“No. I think this fearmongering is on me. I should have offered a more thorough explanation to everyone on why we were building up our defenses. More importantly, I shouldn’t have given Bubblegum a private tour of the settlement. I knew any perception of unequal treatment would spell bad news, but I couldn’t help myself. Strong relations with the candy kingdom are essential to our survival and flourishing as a colony. If this one fails… If this one fails, I don’t think anyone else on founders island will be willing to ever leave it again.”  
“It’s a tough situation. I don’t know how, but it goes without saying that Simon and I are willing to help in anyway we can. Right Simon?”  
“Of course. Although, I’m concerned we may be viewed with suspicion from everyone at that make-shift rally.”  
A perturbed look crossed Marc’s face.   
“Why do you believe that?”  
“Well, our relationships aren’t really a secret to anyone here. Everyone knows Finn is loyal to the candy kingdom and has his mom in the human settlement. And Marceline literally went kingdom to kingdom to help me apologize for actions I previously committed. Not to mention they already knew we had been helping the human settlement before it formally opened today. Knowing how connected we are to both societies, their perceptions of where our loyalties lie may be murky at best.”  
“I see. It’s a more than valid point. One that I wish you hadn’t made to be honest. I apologize for coming and going so suddenly, but I must brief the council about these potential issues to our future diplomacy. Minerva bot, could you please assist me?  
“Certainly.”  
“Oh. Before I forget. I was hoping to sign this with Bubblegum, but I’m unsure if today’s actions will have changed her mind. Finn, I have a defensive agreement with me. It doesn’t promise any trade or military weapons, but it does state if one of us is attacked the other will come to their aid. I know it’s a lot to ask, but could you see if the princess would still be willing to sign it. I’m just fearful someone may attack us while we are distracted, or in attempt to scare us away.”  
“I can’t promise you that she will sign it. But I can promise you that I’ll show it, and tell her what you’ve just told me.”  
“Thank you.”  
Minerva and Marc said their goodbyes and departed. The remaining pair of humans stood in silence for a moment. Then, they noticed two figures heading their way. Marceline had her arm around Bubblegum. Bubblegum’s eyes showed undeterred rage, but the rest of her face was resigned to defeat.  
“Come on guys. Let’s all go sit down somewhere. I think we need to talk.”


	5. Making plans

The group made their way to the deserted ice cream parlor. Finn couldn’t resist ordering an additional cup. Ice cream always helped with stress; it would calm him down. This time, he made sure to finish the strawberries before they could be cruelly taken from him. After satisfying his justified paranoia of losing his snack, Finn glanced around. First, he peaked to his right. Marceline was still trying to console Bubblegum, who didn’t seem to be registering anything around her. She was way too busy to try and mess with Finn. Every so often, Bubblegum’s eyes would light up with an all too familiar intensity of emotion. Her eyes gave off every indicator that she was going to fly into a rage and scream at anyone unlucky enough to be around her. But the look was fleeting. The spark in her eyes would dissipate as quickly as it appeared. Finn had flinched out of habit several times, but never got the expected verbal lashing.  
Finn looked to his left. Simon was staring down the plaza. He too was wearing an all too familiar face. He was deep in thought. Finn became aware of a tapping noise. He lowered his gaze to see Simon nervously tapping his fingers against the table. Finn looked back up and then followed Simon’s eyes. Down the plaza, the isolationist group was still in full force. The seeker force was visibly smaller, but the number of isolationists had swelled. That didn’t make sense. Why would the settlement guards shrink away in the face of a potential threat?  
“Hey Simon, what are you thinking about?”  
“Well, honestly I’m concerned the humans have more on their plate than they thought they would and are being stretched thin.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well, Marc probably alerted the seekers about their increasingly disorderly guests near the research facility. Some probably made sure to backup the Minerva bots. Its probably difficult to make more of them right now. But more importantly, their division could be an opportunity for anyone who wants to cause trouble today.”  
“Yeah, I noticed some of the seekers were gone. I was actually worried some of them supported the isolationists and left so they could actually do something.”  
“Yeah. That was my other hypothesis. It’s a scary one for sure. We don’t really have much to go off of. Maybe we could try keeping an eye on everything. The settlement’s government is having a lot of trouble today. I’m particularly worried about the diplomatic celebration they plan to hold later.”  
“Oh snap, I almost forgot about that! Do you think someone will something?”  
“Its possible. I assume the settlement will have extra security now. But that in itself might end up making some of the guests even angrier.”  
“Man, political stuff is tough. I’m glad I’m not a princess or diplomat or anything. PB you got it rough.”  
Bubblegum let out a soft laugh. She was slowly returning. Simon glanced at Marceline and motioned to the register. The pair excused themselves but stayed within earshot.  
“You don’t know the half of it, Finn.”  
“No, I don’t. I don’t think any of us really do. Actually, I think I need to apologize for a while ago. I was so set on finding a peaceful path to you and your uncle’s problems I kind of brushed everything else aside. I didn’t really consider what could have happened to your kingdom or any of the others if my plan backfired.”  
“Its okay Finn. Honestly, I made a lot of mistakes that day too.”  
“What, no way! You were out there ready to fight for your kingdom!”  
“Finn, I filled my war room with people who couldn’t think for themselves. I had Lemongrab in the war room. I had LSP in the war room! Heck, even though he was hit with the dum-dum juice, Pep But was still my second in command.”  
“Wait, what?”  
“The point is that I was trying to make sure my plans would go through with minimal resistance. I should have been open to ideas by people who could actually think for themselves. Glob, I drew a bunch of the Candy Kingdom’s allies into the war and didn’t give them a chance to contribute.”  
“Okay, but you knew best right?”  
“That’s the point Finn. I only thought I knew best because I shut myself off from every other opinion like I always do. The others are right to be skeptical of me. But I’ve also learned something.”  
“Oh? What’s that?”  
“Just because they’re right doesn’t make me wrong.”  
“I… don’t follow.”  
“The others are looking out for the best interests, or what they think are the best interests of their kingdoms, just like how I always do. Right now, our perceptions clash. They don’t benefit as much from human technology as the candy kingdom does. And they’re not used to special weapons that can hurt them existing.”  
“So, what, they’re all just scared that you benefit more from the humans than they do?”  
“Exactly. A lot of them don’t really need or see the value in the human tech. And they certainly don’t see why the humans are developing it. I think Marlo and BP are trying to cause major drama. I just don’t know why now.”  
“Maybe they are actually scared you know? I mean, you already do have a lot of banana guards, not to mention Marcy, Jake and me.”  
“Yeah, but they weren’t this scared until today. Maybe the fears have been building up overtime and just seeing the human’s research caused them to all come up. Or maybe there’s something I’m not seeing.”  
“I could try to follow Marlo for you. Sneak style.”  
“That could work.”  
Marceline floated back to the table with Simon in tow.  
“Bonnie, no! You would literally just be proving his point! They were already angry you were spying on their kingdoms. You can’t just have Finn stalk the guy because you think he’s planning against you.”  
“Well what am I supposed to do? They’re all saying they want to keep their kingdoms safe from me. I need to keep my kingdom safe from what this bozo might be doing behind the scenes.”  
“I know Bonnie. But don’t send Finn. I’ll go. I won’t get caught.”  
“I thought you were against my espionage.”  
“Yeah, when its unjustified. You saw that guy. He clearly has a bone to pick. If we can figure out why maybe we can get the princesses to stop listening to him, without you insulting or threatening them.”  
Bubblegum took a deep breath.   
“Okay Marcy. I trust you to do this. Just don’t get hurt okay?”  
“Please, when do I ever get hurt?”  
The couple shared a quick kiss.   
“Bonnie please don’t do anything reckless while I’m following this dingus.”  
“No promises. But I’ll try, for you.”  
Next, Marceline gave Simon a quick hug.  
“Don’t do anything dumb while I’m gone.”  
“When have I ever done anything dumb?”  
“Well there was this one time where you put on a crown a bunch, and that time you almost fell into the music hole, and like every day you didn’t have your memories…”  
“Okay, okay point taken. Don’t worry. I don’t plan on doing anything dumb Marcy, I know you’d kill me.”  
“Like I would hurt you.”  
With that, the vampire queen turned invisible. The remaining members of the group stood silent.   
“Oh PB. As long as you’re looking out for your kingdom first, elder Marc gave me a treaty for you to look over.”  
Finn dug into his bag and pulled out the now slightly crumpled defense pact. Bubblegum snatched it and gave it a cursory read.  
“Nothing about technology exchanges. The humans probably want to test the waters first. Can’t say I blame them. In fact, maybe this will show the others that I’m not just interested in human tech.”  
Bubblegum reached into her hair and produced a silver pen.  
“PB you keep a pen in your hair?”  
“It’s convenient. A girl never knows when she’ll need to sign a treaty on behalf of her kingdom. Besides not all of us carry backpacks around all day.”  
Simon cleared his throat.  
“Princess maybe its not my place, but are you sure it’s a good idea to sign this right now? Tensions are pretty high, and this could be taken as a sign that you don’t care about what the other princess’s think.”  
“I don’t care what they think, Simon. I need to do what’s best for my kingdom, just like they’re trying to do.”  
“Wouldn’t an in-depth, public discussion be best for everyone though? I know they weren’t exactly cooperative outside of the research facility. But surely in a more formal setting you, or elder Marc could better sway them to your perspective. It just seems like this would be giving your opposition more ammo.”  
“You didn’t seem to object to sending Marceline to spy on Marlo. Is that not also giving them more ammo?”  
“Marceline can go invisible and fly. If she somehow got caught, she could claim she was shadowing visitors all day because of the concerns with the isolationists. They might not believe her, but they couldn’t refute her either. But this… this would be a very public declaration of indifference.”  
“The candy kingdom has to be assertive.”  
“Yes, but you could be assertive in a different way. You said that it’s a defense pact with no tech exchange, right? Are there any other special clauses or commitments?”  
“No. It just says that the Candy kingdom will help defend the human settlement against raiders or formal declarations of war.”  
“So why not call on everyone to make that pledge? You could do it during the diplomatic ceremony later. You use it to open dialogue between the humans and other kingdoms. The humans will get protection and guarantees of safety, and none of the kingdoms will enjoy a technological advantage over the others. And I’m sure the humans will be grateful to the candy kingdom for setting up a multi-kingdom defense pact.”  
“That solution is a bit quixotic don’t you think? The other kingdoms will still suspect me of making some sort of secret deal.”  
“They’re going to think that no matter what you do. But if you sign that document without openly discussing it first, you’ll be validating every fear the other kingdoms have. Besides, what’s the harm in waiting a couple of hours?”  
Bubblegum stared at the pen in her hand. Then she stared at the treaty. Finally, she glanced at Simon. He looked visibly concerned yet confident. Bubblegum contemplated.   
“Okay Simon. I’m going to trust you on this. Marceline always has confidence in your decisions, and you probably have the best understanding of human politics of anyone outside of the settlement. Just please don’t be wrong.”  
“Thank you, princess. And don’t worry. I’m sure this should work.”


	6. Recon

Who knew following a silver-tongued wizard would be such a snooze fest? It felt like it she was at one of Ooo’s pointless royalty meetings. Except now she didn’t have Bonnie or LSP with her for snide comments. She didn’t know how long it had been. It felt like it she’d been following him forever. In reality, it was probably around an hour. A dull, drawn out, hour. Ever since she found him, all this guy had been doing was boring stuff. He didn’t try to work up any guests into a frenzy, he didn’t try to turn anyway into snakes, heck he didn’t even show the normal zaniness that wizards were known for. It figures that the most boring wizard would be chosen for a political position.  
Nevertheless, Marceline continued following. At this point, she could predict everything that was happening. Marlo would find someone. Then he would compliment them. Then he would talk about how he was such a powerful wizard and how great Wizard City was. If he was talking to a human or someone from a far-away kingdom, particularly a rough or professionally looking man, he would promise to show them a spell or two sometime. Then he would make a bad joke and move on, only to repeat the process with his next target.  
For the first ten minutes, Marceline considered that he was systematically choosing people. Maybe he was casting a spell under his breath. She wasn’t completely wrong. There was definitely a system to some of the people who he picked. And he was trying to cast a spell on these people. Just not a magical one. He didn’t physically show it, but every time he spoke to someone, he was nervous. She heard his heart-beat faster. His normally monotone voice cracked. He never looked them in the eyes.   
“Maybe he should try casting a spell to give himself a bit more game.” she thought to herself  
At first, watching this guy was a little funny. But it quickly became painful. Sad even. In a way, it reminded Marceline of her past self. But at the same time, this guy would completely transform when talking to a princess or a diplomat. Any hint of nervousness was gone. Maybe it was just an act to get people to lower their guard around him?  
He was on the move again. He turned a corner. She let him pull ahead of her more than usual. It wouldn’t matter really. He was just going to do the same thing anyway. But she needed to keep following him. If there was even a slight chance that this would produce anything meaningful it was worth it. She turned the corner. The street was almost entirely void of life, certainly void of intelligence life until she arrived. He was talking to some humans. But his voice and body language were different. He wasn’t his calm collected self, but he wasn’t his previous nervous self either. He was trying to look tall, but his feet weren’t firm. He had one hand in his robe sleeve and the other raised. The humans were advancing. She caught a flash of steel. There was going to be a show. Heck, maybe she could just happen to save him and get him to agree to back-off the candy kingdom. She let the scene play out in front of her.  
“I’m a powerful wizard! And an important visiting representative! You better back off!”  
“Don’t look so important to me. Weird clothing, no guards. You probably ain’t even a wizard.”  
“Do you not see this golden robe? Do you not see my luscious beard? You must all be thick in the head so I’ll give you one last chance. Back off now or I’ll—”  
“You’ll what? Turn us into newts? The others howled with laughter.  
“Fine, you asked for it!”  
The bearded man withdrew his concealed hand. He was clenching a small, smoky vial with a red label. He threw it on the ground in front of him. First there was a feint hissing sound, then a lazy greyness started to emerge. In a couple of seconds, it blanketed the street. Regular people wouldn’t be able to see their hand in front of themselves. Luckily, Marceline wasn’t regular. She made out each of their figures clear as day. Marlo took off in her direction, and she narrowly avoided letting him run into her. For an old guy, he was fast. She glanced back at the humans, who had since descended on the spot the wizard once stood. In a couple of seconds, the haze cleared. Confused, the humans wondered off.  
Instead of chasing after the golden clad wizard, Marceline searched the ground where he stood. Among the dirt and discarded bottle caps she found the smashed remains of the vial. More importantly, she found the label.   
“For quick escapes- smoke potion. Made in Ron James’s potion’s shop?”   
Maybe Simon could shed some light on this. He mentioned the name a couple of times when he was still under the crown’s influence. She let out a sigh. This recon mission wasn’t a total waste of time, but it wasn’t the definition of helpful either.   
Marceline found her way back to the ice cream parlor. Simon was sitting alone. Wait, why was he alone? Why didn’t they all stay together, especially with guests and settlers alike potentially being hostile right now?  
She briefly contemplated sneaking up on him, but thought against it. This wasn’t Finn or Jake. There would be no high-pitched scream leading to an overly macho attitude in attempt to save face. She’d seen how Simon reacted to sudden surprises too many times to count. He’d punch her or hit her with something and then feel guilty about it the rest of the week. She’d get the other two back somehow for leaving Simon behind though.  
“Hey, Simon. Where are the others?”  
“Oh, Marcy good you’re back. Finn and Bonnibel headed to the diplomatic ceremony a bit early. I said I’d wait here in case you came back here. I was actually going to leave in a couple of minutes.”  
“I said not to do anything dumb, yet here you are by yourself. You’ve seen how angry some people here are. They could have grabbed you or something.”  
“I think I’m pretty safe. I confess, I was worried for a bit when some isolationists came over when everyone was gone, but they more or less see me as the only connection to their pre-mushroom war culture. It actually gave me an idea for the ceremony.”  
“Uh, Hello? You think you’re pretty safe yet a bunch of those meatheads came to you when you were alone? Do you know how badly that could have gotten?!”  
“Okay, I admit it sounds less safe than I first made it out to be. But really, I don’t think anyone is interested in coming after me. I’m not a diplomat or political figure for the isolationists to target, and I’m pretty sure all of the princesses are scared of what you would do to them if anything happened to me.”  
She sighed. He was right. Unlike Bonnie, he didn’t have a political bullseye on his back. And it was common sense that she would go after anyone who tried to mess with him. Several princesses had already learned that the hard way when they tried to imprison him as revenge for previous kidnappings.  
“You’re right. Still though, there’s no telling what someone might try right now. You know I’m just worried.”  
“I know Marcy, and believe me I appreciate your concern.”  
“Anyway, I’m actually glad I have you alone. Before we head to the ceremony, I need to ask you about this.”  
She dug into her pocket and handed him the red scrap of paper. He folded his brow and looked up at her.  
“A smoke spell from Ron James’s shop? What about it?”  
“That Marlo guy used it instead of fighting a bunch of humans who cornered him. I was wondering if you had any insights to why he would use it instead of fighting or something.”  
“Hm. Well the way I see it there are two possibilities. First, he may have not wanted to cause a scene or potentially get kicked out of the city for disruptive behavior.”  
“He was alone with the humans. Nobody else was around.”  
“His magic could be visible so it would be easy to link him with whatever happened. But I see your point. Which leads to my second idea. From what I remember, Ron James’s shop was a real dump. Most wizards who went there were pretty weak and used his spells to try and boost their own magic.”  
“So, what, he’s a weakling?”  
“Pretty much. Actually, that fits better. While you were away, Bubblegum mentioned how he was pretty upset about the humans developing anti-magic technology to counter local wizards. I admit I haven’t seen it, but it must be pretty primitive right now. Maybe the reason he’s so angry about it is because its just powerful enough to cancel out his magic, but not enough that stronger wizards are concerned.”  
“Okay, but wouldn’t all of the wizards be concerned about the anti-magic technology.”  
“No, not really. Most of the stronger ones are pretty full of themselves. They don’t think anything can pose a threat to them, even when they’re clearly out of their league. But the ones at the bottom of the power spectrum tend to be overly concerned with their standing in the world. Heck, maybe Marlo is even one of the local wizards who have been threatening the humans and is concerned that stuff will even the playing field.”  
“So, what should we do now?”  
“Well, like I said I have an idea for the ceremony so we should head there. I’ll need your help with it though. You’re a lot better of a singer than I am.”  
“Of course, I’ll help. Wait, what?”


	7. Celebration Part One

The carved oak doors opened into a grandiose room. It was adorned with luxuries old and new. A crystal chandelier hung from the center. The walls were smothered with artwork of all different ages. Each piece depicted important events in human history following the mushroom war. The surrogate father-daughter duo took momentary interest in a painting titled Escape. The work depicted the remnants of humanity departing a shadowy continent on a dingy boat. The boat dwellers were staring at two figures hovering above the water. One of them was a lion with bloody fangs and chicken legs who was wearing a crudely made crown. Despite towering over his opponent, his face wore the distinct look of terror. The other was a teenage girl with grey skin. In one hand she held a stake and in the other a red axe. She wore a white sash with the word savior written in blue. Her face radiated absolute confidence. The left bottom hand corner held the artist’s signature, a curved J.  
“It didn’t really go down like that. I mean, he wasn’t scared of me and he wasn’t that tall. I was pretty confident though.”  
The pair moved on. Soon, grand marble statues of humans in animal hats came into sight. Each statue’s base was labeled with a name and date. Every statue had a small plaque on the wall next to it listing off the depicted individual’s achievements. The statues were imposing and seemed to judge everyone who walked by them.  
Soon, they came to their destination. A smaller, yet still impressive set of doors which led into the banquet hall. The two were greeted by the doorman and allowed inside. The room was surprisingly plain compared to what they had seen before. It was divided into two distinct areas. The first portion was filled to the brim with people and little else. Princesses, diplomats, and what looked to be the highest echelon of human society were scattered about. Despite their best efforts, any outside observer would notice how few actual conversations were going on. People were talking, but every speaker was struggling to be heard. Listeners strained their necks and ears to identify any sounds that could be interpreted as a word. The other half of the room was orderly. There were four tables that were each covered in a white and gold cloth and golden candlesticks stretched across the room. Slips of paper with names crudely scribbled onto them were positioned in front of each chair. At the far end of the room was a perpendicular fifth table with similar decorations raised onto a platform. Instead of slips of paper, each chair was marked with refined nuggets of silver.  
Simon and Marceline nodded at one another and explored the empty half of the room. They made their way to the raised table and observed names on the silver strips. Elder Marc’s name was on the far-left corner standing out amongst various others. Concentrated in the center of the table were various council members and descendants of founders. On the far-right Marceline caught sight of her own name. Simon was seated on her right, and Finn at the very end of the table. Simon discretely swapped the nugget with Finn’s name on it with the one his right. Bubblegum’s name was, however, was noticeably absent.  
“They have all of the princesses and diplomats sitting at the other tables Marcy. They probably figured it would be a bit rude for Bonnibel to be the only foreign royalty sitting at this table.”  
A dark-haired woman in a red dress separated from the crowd on the other side of the room. She began walking towards the pair.  
“I guess. I’d still prefer for her to be sitting with us though. Besides, I’m not sure I like that she’ll be among a bunch of the people who were protesting her a couple of hours ago.”  
“Maybe we could speak to someone and express your concern? Although, I admit it may cause tensions to flare a bit more. The other princesses might see it as evidence of special treatment. Alternatively, we could go sit with her, but that might cause all the fat cats up here to feel slighted by us. Personally, I think we should trust the other princesses to act civil. We could request a Minerva bot or some security to scrutinize Bubblegum’s area though.”  
“I think you’re right. Them thinking Bonnie is getting special treatment started this mess. Maybe showing them that she isn’t will help people cool down.”  
The woman reached the pair and clasped her hands on their shoulders.  
“Oh, nonsense to that! You are two of our honored guests! I’m sure we can find a suitable explanation to Princess Bubblegum being seated at the VIP table.”  
Her voice was inviting, but she looked to be gritting her teeth with each word.  
“I’m sorry, who are you exactly?” Marceline said as she removed the woman’s hand from her shoulder. She quickly reached over and removed her other hand from Simon, who was struggling with himself to not be rude.  
“How disrespectful of me. I am councilwoman Lana Tollins.”  
“Councilwoman Tollins, we appreciate your gesture, but like I said it may be best to leave the current seating as is. I’m sure you’ve heard of the disruption from earlier today?”  
Tollins turned her head to Simon and shook her head.  
“That? That was a minor inconvenience at worst! I’m sure seating Bubblegum with the rest of our distinguished guests will be of no concern.”  
“A minor inconvenience! Those princesses looked like they wanted blood for a minute! I should know, I was in the middle of it!”  
“Come now great protector, surely you must be overstating this?”  
“Listen, I don’t mean to be rude or unappreciative of your offer councilwoman, but Simon’s right. I don’t want to risk messing anything up for Bonnie.”  
“I see. Well, you don’t have to worry. I’ll take care of everything.”  
“Wait!”  
The dark-haired woman withdrew and vanished into the sea of bodies. Marceline tried to follow as closely as she could, but was cut-off when the crowd restructured itself. She rose in the air desperately looking for any identifying features, but was forced to concede the search. She returned to Simon’s side.  
“Why do I feel like I may have just made things worse for Bonnie?”

A large, flat, drum looking instrument was pushed into the room. The crowd didn’t seem to take notice, being enthralled in attempting to impress one another. Simon looked to Marceline and mouthed the word loud. He quickly covered his ears in anticipation of the noise. He darted his eyes to try and get Marceline to do the same. Instead, she stared at him quizzically before stacking her hands-on top of his. He started to protest before she shushed him. She flashed her best attempt at one of his smiles. The kind he had often worn to calm her down when she was a little girl. She looked towards the foreign instrument. It didn’t look like it was going to be terribly loud. A man holding an oversized mallet walked into the room and positioned himself next to it. He began grazing the mallet over the instrument. A deep hum began to fill the room. He became faster and wilder in his motions. A few observant members of the crowd began to stare. A couple of humans covered their ears as well. He began pulling his arms back. Simon’s face contorted as he braced himself.  
The man finished ramping up and swung the mallet with everything he had. The gong produced an ear-splitting clamor. Most of the crowd were caught completely off guard. Many stumbled in place upon hearing the noise, unsure what to make of it. Several of the guests ducked for cover in their confusion while others turned back ready to fight. Many brought hands to their ears hoping to soothe themselves of the unwanted ringing. After quickly catching herself, Marceline laughed. Her earlier fears of the dark-haired woman temporarily subsided. Admittedly, the sound was louder than she expected. Her own ears were still buzzing, but she didn’t make a complete fool of herself like most of the others. She rubbed her ears and glimpsed at Simon. He wasn’t holding his ears like the others. In fact, he looked surprised.  
“I actually thought it would be louder.” He whispered.  
Elder Marc emerged in the door frame. He carefully removed and hid a pair of earplugs before fully stepping into the crowd’s view. He took advantage of the temporary silence and addressed the crowd.  
“Distinguished guests. It is my honor to welcome you to our celebration of future diplomacy! If everyone could please make their way to the tables and begin looking for their assigned seats, we shall be able to begin to festivities in no time!”  
The crowd began messily lurching forward. Princesses scooped up name tags to examine them and tossed them aside without care where they landed. Diplomats and other guests were a bit more civil, but eventually were forced to take up the same practice. Out of the corner of her eye, Marceline spotted Finn awkwardly trying to find his name tag on one of the lower tables. She debated letting him struggle for a minute, but saw that Simon was about to step down into the chaos to grab him. She held him back and motioned for him to take his seat. After making sure he did so, Marceline floated above the mob and plucked Finn by is armpits. She lazily floated back, but made sure to lower Finn so that he would inadvertently kick a couple of the snobbier princesses. She returned and plopped him down near his seat before taking her own. She began scanning the crowd to make sure Bubblegum wasn’t being harassed. Luckily, she had found her seat quickly and was doing her best to ignore the chaos around her.  
Finn was confused. He looked at the silver nugget with his name on it for a moment before sitting. He looked to the nugget to his right expecting to find a familiar name. Instead, he was greeted with one he couldn’t pronounce. He debated asking Simon, but decided it wasn’t worth the effort.  
After fifteen minutes of the guests making fools of themselves, everyone seemed to be settled in. The raised table, however, remained noticeably unoccupied. At the end of it stood various figures. Elder Marc and councilwoman Tollins were at the front of the line, both staring in the direction of the princesses. One by one, each member of the line strolled behind their seat but did not sit down. Simon took notice and rose before nudging the other two. Finn stammered at first but stood up and stared into the room. Marceline rolled her eyes and let out a sigh, but followed suit. Members continued to take their place behind their chairs. One man paused for a minute when he got to Finn. He looked like he was going to speak out, but instead continued down the line cautiously observing each nugget until finding his own at the very end. Eventually, every chair had someone trying to appear impressive behind it. A clinking sound came from the middle of the line. An unfamiliar man’s voice filled the room. It was high-pitched and various guests were forced to stifle their laughter; Marceline included.  
“I want to thank everyone for coming today. I am council chair Wayne. I take great pride in being able to welcome everyone today, and hope each of you have had a wonderful time exploring our settlement. However, before we begin, I was made aware of an unfortunate situation. It seems there was a slight issue with our seating chart which I would like to amend.  
Marceline’s giggles caught in her throat and eyes widened. She looked to councilwoman Tollins who put on a face splitting smile and waved at her.  
“I will spare the details of the situation, but I would like to ask for Princess Bubblegum to please join us at the VIP table, and for any affront this may have caused.”  
All eyes in the room turned to the candy princess. Normally calm and collected, she was hesitant, quivering even.  
“Thank you, but I don’t think that its- “  
“Nonsense princess, I won’t hear of it! You deserve to be up here with your friends and the rest of the VIPs. Please, we can make room for you easily enough.”  
“Really, I appreciate it, but I’m just one of many princesses here today. It wouldn’t be fair.”  
“It isn’t fair for you to not join us here princess.”  
Bubblegum sat frozen for a minute before awkwardly pushing out her chair. She made her way to the edge of the raised table. A crude wooden chair was carried to the right-side end of the table. Soon, everyone to Finn’s right began shifting one chair over. The man who had briefly paused behind Finn hesitated before standing behind his new chair. He looked like he was going to cry. Bubblegum was ushered behind the now unoccupied chair next to Finn. She took her place and stared into her hands.  
“Good. With that sorted out, the VIP table can now take their seats, and the food can be brought out.”


	8. Celebration Part Two

Bubblegum didn’t touch her food. She was paralyzed, humiliated even. The last think she had needed was more attention or perceived special treatment, so of course that’s what she received from the human leaders. Weren’t they briefed of the earlier situation? She glanced around the room. Princesses and diplomats were still glaring at her from every table. When she first caught them, she expected them to turn away. A few did. But most were relentless. It felt as if they were collectively attempting to dig into her skull. She gave a quick glance to her left. Finn, Simon, and Marceline weren’t eating either. Further down the row, she saw that elder Marc hadn’t been eating either. Instead, he was darting his eyes between the council and the seemingly less important guests. Then his eyes locked onto hers. He quickly produced a pen, tore off a piece of the table cloth and scribbled onto it. He gingerly passed the note to a Minerva bot and pointed at Bubblegum. The bot nodded but didn’t budge. They weren’t trying to cause any more attention to her.  
The clanking of a fork to glass followed by a high-pitched voice pulled Bubblegum from her thoughts. She looked in Wayne’s direction but didn’t listen to what he was saying. Out of the corners of her eyes, she saw that many of the princesses continued their fruitless efforts to drill into her. They were now joined by a sizable number of diplomats.   
The high pitch voice subsided. He had mentioned something about older human culture. Several musicians had gathered in the empty portion of the room. Instruments, some new, some familiar were brought inside. A piano, a couple guitars, a set of drums, but also a weird triangle and what looked like wooden chicken legs with colorful designs. An odd mixture of music began to fill the room. Much of the music was accompanied by lyrics that didn’t make a lot of sense. One song was about people who called themselves different colors of something called Christmas. Another was about a woman named Grace who seemed to be amazing for some reason. Yet another was about a shark’s teeth, but also about a guy who had a knife? Old human music was confusing. Maybe the lyrics were just lost in translation after hundreds of years. It wouldn’t be the first time. As the musicians wrapped up their latest song, Simon stood up and spoke.  
“I apologize for the interruption, but this is the perfect opportunity. I believe everyone in the room can agree that you have been such wonderful hosts today. I wanted to ask permission to share a couple of songs that I remember from before the war. You could add them to your, err, wonderful collection.”  
Council chair Wayne broke out in a wide grin. He quickly ushered the musicians to take a break. Simon and Marceline rose and caught one of the guitarists before he could leave. After a small hesitation, the man handed Marceline his guitar and sat down. Simon sat himself at the piano that had been rolled into the room. Marceline began floating around waiting for Simon to begin.  
“Marcy why don’t you pick the first song?”  
“You know what, I think I will. But you’ll have to start it. It’s that song you sang to me when you first found me.”  
Simon began playing the piano while Marceline followed along on the guitar. Simon began singing about sunshine, happiness and a grey sky. Marceline joined in, and the pair allowed each other to fade out and take the lead depending on the part of the song. Simon looked around. Several people, Marceline included, had tears forming in their eyes. He felt a bit of stinging himself.  
Simon picked the next couple of songs. At first, he was met with confusion when he announced they were all from a human group known as the Beatles. But as he suspected, each song was a hit. People tapped their feet in place, hummed along, and bopped their heads.  
Marceline picked the next two songs. Old showtunes that she had remembered playing for Two-Bread Tom and his group. She was surprised when a couple of the older humans began singing along, although they were out of tune and sometimes used the wrong lyrics. It was a nice chance to reminisce, but she felt a pit in her stomach about playing the songs again.  
Finally, Simon ended the mini-concert with a goofy romantic song he used to listen to with Betty. It was funny. They had started listening to it as a bad joke but like most things in life it grew on them. Now it came across as cruelly ironic. The premise of the song was for the lovers to be together forever with each other. Of course, that couldn’t happen anymore. Towards the end of the song his voice started to crack and he felt as if he might break down. Picking this song was probably a bad decision, but so was letting it forgotten to time. He saw Marceline catch on to his struggling and quickly tried to hide it. Too late. She announced the concert was over and briefly took him outside.  
He expected her to be upset. Not angry or ready to blame him for anything, but upset nonetheless. He knew how she dreaded seeing him like this. Seemingly unable or unwilling to be helped. Everything had been going so well up to that point too.  
“Why did you do that to yourself, Simon?”  
He hesitated. By the tone of her voice, there wasn’t going to be a satisfactory answer he could give her. He looked at her feet but gave his honest answer.  
“I guess I didn’t want the song to be lost to time. Sure, it brought up some sad memories. But they all kind of did. But they brought back happy memories too. I thought it was important to keep those songs and memories alive and well. I guess I was on the same train of thought as you when you picked our first song.”  
He looked back up. She wasn’t frowning like he had expected. Instead, she wore a look of recognition. She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. For a couple seconds they forgot about the room full of people they had just walked out from.  
“Marcy, I don’t mean to ruin the moment, but after we get back inside, I think you should check on Bonnibel. She looks like she could really use your support right now.”  
“I know. I’m just anxious, I guess. I want to tell her about it being my fault for her being dragged up in front of everybody, but I don’t want to make it look like it was intentional or anything.”  
“She’ll appreciate the honesty. I know I would.”  
“Simon. Do you think I should apologize to everyone in the room? Make them all understand I caused the special treatment?”  
“I’m not sure if that matters anymore to be honest. They’ll perceive what happened however they want. They might think you’re just covering for her.”  
“That’s what I was afraid you would say.”  
“Come on, let’s go inside.”  
The pair re-entered the room and were immediately met with applause and accolades. Any tension or hostility that had been in the air before was gone— at least temporarily.   
After the initial response died down, elder Marc rose.  
“I want to sincerely thank the both of you. Many of the songs you played for us had been lost, we thought forever. And those that we retained turned out to be slightly corrupted by time. As I said this morning, our settlement truly values our past culture.”  
Elder Marc sat down. Council chair Wayne stood up.  
“Building from what elder Marc has said, I would like to extend an offer. Simon you have previously proven helpful to the settlement’s construction as well as its teachings on human history. I know that you do not live in the settlement, but you are the most qualified human alive for what I am about to ask of you.”  
Simon felt a lump in his throat. He didn’t intend to be drawn into the political game. In hind sight, he should have seen this coming.  
“Simon, I would like to ask if you would be willing to take on a very old role, we were unsure if would be of any relevance. In anticipation of today, we have been studying our few surviving texts on how our ancestor’s conducted foreign affairs. One aspect was what they called “cultural diplomacy.” We attempted to practice it today by showcasing our art and surviving music. You have displayed a great deal of knowledge of our culture’s past, and have learned about our culture in the present. We would be honored if you would help us by representing our culture to the other kingdoms of Ooo.”  
Simon felt light-headed. On one hand, it was a sensible request. He had helped the settlement a great deal, and was the only person who was actually around to remember the culture before the Mushroom war. At the same time, it would murky the already disgusting waters. His connections with Marceline and by extension Bubblegum were sure to bring ire to the other kingdoms. It would look like the humans were continuing to inch closer towards the candy kingdom. But was it already too late? They had already made him the offer, and he had already been sitting as a VIP.   
He looked to the room. All eyes were on him. None of the princesses were angry. In fact, many who he caught scowling at Bubblegum were smiling. This was a weird feeling by itself. He would travel and talk with princesses and diplomats- many of which he had once upon a time stalked and kidnapped- to represent human culture. It could help bring stability between the humans and other kingdoms. He looked to Bubblegum. She didn’t look nervous or concerned about this. Instead, she was smiling. A Minerva bot was walking away from her.  
“This is a sudden and er, unexpected development. I hope it wouldn’t be rude if I asked for a bit of time to consider your offer?”  
The council chair grinned.  
“Of course, of course. I apologize for putting you on the spot and expecting an answer so quickly.”  
Simon let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. He and Marceline made their way back to their seats. After they sat down, Bubblegum stood up.  
“I would like to make an announcement.”  
All eyes transfixed onto Bubblegum. Many faces still lulled by the performance, but some had instantly regained their former hostility.  
“I know that there are speculations between a secret deal between the Candy Kingdom and human settlement. I know my being up at this table, and my tour with elder Marc have arose suspicion from many of you. Especially those of you who know some of the wrongs I have committed in the past.”  
She swallowed. Some of the hostility appeared to momentarily vanish. She reached into her pocket and produced the defense agreement she had reviewed earlier that day.  
“I was given an agreement by elder Marc about a defense treaty between my kingdom and the human settlement. I am willing to allow anyone who wishes to review this contract with their own eyes. The agreement is a mutual defense pact. If one of us is targeted, the other will come to their aid. It forbids territorial expansion or aggression on either signatory’s part. I want to make it clear that there were no stipulations of technology trade, joint military exercises, or anything of the like.”  
A few grumbles of doubt escaped the crowd, but she continued.  
“I want to make it publicly known that the candy kingdom will honor this agreement. But I also want to extend it. In an effort of cooperation, I believe every kingdom should sign this agreement with the human settlement. That way, those of you with concerns of a joint-human-candy take over, of developing military technologies, or of secret alliances can rest easy. I invite everyone in this room to either sign the document, or pledge themselves to honoring peace between all of our civilizations.”  
Multiple princesses shot up and made their way to Bubblegum. Bubblegum produced her hair pen and various signatures were added to the agreement. Slowly, other princesses and diplomats began forming a line to sign the document. Bubblegum looked to elder Marc who shot her thumbs up. She looked over to Finn who patted her on the back in return. Finally, she looked to Marceline and Simon. Both returned her gaze with relieved smiles.  
The line of princesses and diplomats waned. In all, twenty kingdoms had signed the pact. Noticeably absent, however, included the Breakfast and Slime kingdoms, Wizard City, and the settlement’s closest neighbors- the nearby nomadic and forest communities.  
Bubblegum sighed but handed the document to council chair Wayne. Shortly after, the council chair departed the festivities.   
“The next part is the dance, and as much as I would like to, I have more pressing matters to attend to” he had said before slipping out the door. Various other councilmembers and descendants of the founders also excused themselves. For a celebration of future diplomacy, there were very few humans of notable rank in attendance.  
Tables were cleared and moved to the sides of the room. The musicians returned and began playing anything they could find on their music sheets. Princesses and diplomats began struggling with one another over the remaining humans to dance with. From the corner of her eye, Bubblegum saw Finn get buried under a pile of them as well.  
She was grabbed from behind and swept off her feet. She let out a short yelp.  
“Marceline come on, don’t sneak up on me like that!”  
“I thought it would be a romantic surprise.”   
“And what’s so romantic about scaring me?”  
“You always look cute when you’re scared.”  
“Knock it off Marceline. If you want to dance, just ask.”  
“Okay. Do you want to dance?”  
“Of course.”


	9. Festivities

The tense and highly political atmosphere slowly relaxed. The humans played a combination of their own music while allowing guests to perform and introduce their own. Princesses and diplomats vied and lined up to dance with the remaining humans. Marceline and Bubblegum were able to quietly inch themselves into an empty corner. Finn found himself dragged and pulled in all different directions. Sometimes by the attending humans, but mostly by the princesses he once saved on a daily basis. In some cases, he would be mistaken for one of the human settlers. Unknowing diplomats would try to cut in only to sink away in embarrassment. Some of the older guests remained on the sidelines. Some were enjoying the music, while others simply enjoyed the unfamiliar company.  
For now, Simon sat alone. In an interesting twist of irony, he had been asked by many of the princesses he had formerly kidnapped to dance. At first, he had obliged to be polite. But he soon found himself mentally tired. The event was reminding him of the many dances and dates he shared with Betty. Of course, this wasn’t an excuse to not participate. But as the event continued, he realized that the festivity was more of a tease than anything. A tease of what he once had, and potentially could have had in another life time. A tease that others in the room could potentially have something he could not. They could meet someone, fall in love, and spend the rest of their lives together. While Betty sacrificed herself years ago, he was still a bit stubborn and held on to his modicum of hope of somehow saving her. Simon lost himself in his recollections for a moment.  
This ray of hope came a couple of days after the return of his sanity. Marceline had taken him to the candy kingdom for his first checkup in one thousand years. On the outside he was just as before he put on the crown for the first-time, a forty-seven-year-old scrawny academic. But on closer inspection, this wasn’t the case. From all of the tests Bubblegum and Dr. Princess had run, despite his physical appearance his body was otherwise operating in its prime. His heart, which was supposed to have been replaced by toffee, was back. What’s more was that it pumped more than 10 times the blood needed to keep himself alive. For a 47-year-old man, that was unheard of. But it was commonplace for a human in their physical prime. Scars he had obtained before fully transitioning to the Ice King were gone without a trace. Bubblegum extracted cells from his liver, kidneys, new heart, several muscles. There was no sign of any lipofuscin, or any wear and tear that naturally came from aging.  
He and Bubblegum eventually came up with a theory— that he was, at the very least, biologically immortal. After failing to wish Betty back with the help of the cosmic being Prismo, Simon asked if he could see Betty’s wish. As it turned out, she had wished to keep him safe. From his own studies, he knew wish magic was often tricky- especially if worded in broad terms like Betty’s was. But safe didn’t necessarily mean immortal. Using his knowledge of Golb, Simon guessed that Betty was able to keep entropy, time, and other agents of decay away from him. It was a guess out of left field, but for the time being it was there best one. Over the next couple of years, Bubblegum performed the same tests. No changes were found. What’s more was that nothing else about him changed. His hair and fingernails didn’t grow or grey. Nor could he grow any facial hair. He couldn’t seem to gain or lose any weight. He wasn’t getting sick either. With all of this new evidence, Bubblegum proposed an addition to his theory. Simon, or rather Betty’s physical perception of Simon, was going to be stick around forever. In a way, this was torture. Being cursed to be without the one you loved while you would continue to live. What’s more, he would never truly move on. Those around him were going to slowly wither and die, and he would be alone again.  
He heard an audible clash, and Simon flashed back to reality. He glanced around the room and quickly found the source. Bodies upon bodies of squirming and fighting princesses had piled up. Looking closer, Simon spotted Finn attempting to squeeze out from under them to no avail. Simon took the rest of the room in. Diplomats were trying to engage several of the humans sitting the dance out. The musicians were desperately trying to keep Lumpy Space Queen from dropping “her sick beats” on the piano. Elder Marc was slowly making his way towards the sitting area. Finally, his eyes settled on Marceline and Bubblegum. They were happily dancing in the corner in their own little world. His mental jade and fatigue melted away. Of course, he missed Betty. He would never get over her- or maybe he never wanted to get over her. But he was elated that Marceline found the kind of love he once enjoyed. If there was any proven upside from his cursed circumstance, it was that he could watch and be apart of this family. Afterall, Marceline suffered from the same curse. And from what he could tell, Bubblegum was also immortal— at least biologically.  
He felt an arm on his shoulder. He turned and was greeted by elder Marc. His face was welcoming, but by the way he was standing, something was off.  
“Greetings Simon. I see you’re not dancing. Not that I blame you. Many of the guests seem to be a bit… rough.”  
“Oh, hi Marc.” Simon smiled. He had waited for the opportunity to say this. No one else would appreciate the joke, but no one else needed to.  
“Is there something I can help you with elder? I’m unsure why, but I get the distinct feeling that something is bothering you.”  
“To tell you the truth, I have a concern. Earlier today, I said I didn’t think the isolationists would be a major concern. But after the incident with Bubblegum sitting at the VIP table, I’ve put a bit of thought into it. The isolationists were protesting on the main plaza today.”  
“Right. I saw them a couple of times.”  
“Yes, well, the thing is that they could have only protested on the plaza if they had a permit to do so. And the only way to get a permit is from a majority vote by the city council.”  
“What are you trying to say?”  
“I think there is some level of fear, or in the worst-case scenario, support, for the isolationists on the settlement’s council. And I think that Bubblegum’s movement to the VIP table is part of a ploy to divide and anger the outside forces, and ultimately try to convince the settlement to remain isolated.”  
“A council woman with dark hair was responsible for that. She overheard Marceline and I talking and she took it upon herself to move Bubblegum.”  
“Councilwoman Tollins. I should have guessed she was involved somehow.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“She is… uncompromising to put it politely. She isn’t terribly popular on or off the council. But she does enjoy support from many of the more reactionary citizens. I’m guessing there’s an overlap between that group and the isolationists.”  
“I see. I know Marcy didn’t take kindly to her after our initial meeting. I’m glad to see her instincts were justified.”  
“In any case, I’m a bit afraid. Right now, it seems like things have calmed a bit. And Bubblegum was able to get a good number of the other kingdoms to sign that defensive pact. But that doesn’t mean we’re out of the woods at all. The isolationists, and Tollins if she is truly involved with them, might point to that as a poor commitment.”  
“Do you think they’ll try something?”  
“I don’t know. Its possible. Tollins is steadfast and I’ve witnessed her say and do all sorts of crazy things to get her way. She’s never caused violence, but I can’t put anything past her.”  
“So, what would you like my help with?”  
“If you don’t mind, could you keep an eye on things here for me? I don’t mean to drag you further into this, but like I said I’m concerned. I want things to go well for all of us. I’m also worried for Bubblegum and some of the other princesses. They could be targeted if anything does happen.”  
“I can do that. I know Marcy won’t let anything happen to Bubblegum, so I can try to look over everyone else for now. I can get Finn to help too.”  
“Thank you. There’s just one more thing I’d like to ask of you.”  
“What’s that?”  
“I know you wanted to take some time to think about the position you were offered. But I honestly believe you should take it. It could help to diffuse the current situation.”  
“I don’t know. A lot of the guests who didn’t sign may silently disagree. They don’t like the candy kingdom having so much perceived influence, and I’m kind of connected to it through Marceline.”  
“I understand that concern. I admit that I’m a bit of an idealist, but I think sharing our culture will help bridge that gap. They’ll see we have no intention of amalgamating with the candy kingdom. And they might be more open to working and trading with us. I’m sure we can even negotiate the halting of research if it really upsets them. But right now, we don’t have anyone to start that dialogue. And you saw everyone’s reaction to your performance. It started a dialogue.”  
Simon pressed his hands together and looked at the ground. There was truth to what the elder was saying. For some reason, he was still hesitant. But why? He was a human and had a rich understanding of human culture. What he didn’t know he could learn. And he was always good at teaching and representing it to new learners—it was his job once upon a time. So, what was the problem? He wasn’t disconnected with—  
Simon stopped. A flash of realization hit him. He was distancing himself from the human settlement the same way he was distancing himself from individual relationships. He was afraid to get attached out of fear the settlement too would eventually wither away. But it would certainly wither away if it didn’t get the help and connections with the other kingdoms it needed.  
It was true, individual humans may not live for a long time in the grand scheme of things. But the humans were developing technology. Minerva was already immortal so long as the central network on the island didn’t fail. Maybe in years to come and enough help, the humans could expand this technology. Longer term connections could be possible.  
“Simon? Hello?”  
“Sorry elder. I was just thinking, and I’ve come to a decision. I would like to help your settlement how I can.”  
“That’s wonderful. I’ll go speak with council chair Wayne right away.”  
Elder Marc bowed and exited the room. Simon looked around the room again. Finn had finally managed to squeeze out of the pile of bodies. Marceline and Bubblegum had stopped dancing at some point in favor of laughing at his situation. To the relief of the musicians LSQ had lost interest in the piano, and was now trying to dance by herself. The room had narrowly avoided a musical disaster.  
Simon walked over to Finn and began to pull him out. Marceline and Bubblegum walked over and helped. Finn stood up only to be dragged away again. The immortal family chuckled at the hero’s misfortune before heading to the rest area.  
Finn was not having a good time. Every minute he was dragged or pulled or pushed in a different direction. He had been under a pile of overly dressed and frankly smelly princesses for the past ten minutes. He finally broke free only to be immediately dragged away again. He couldn’t really say no. He tried too at first, but he was just ignored. For a minute, he considered forcibly pulling himself away. But he knew that long as the princesses were focused on him, they wouldn’t turn their attention to thinking about or annoying PB. Not that Marceline wasn’t enough of a deterrent. But Finn wasn’t just physically keeping a riot or argument from happening. He was preventing them from thinking about one. Even some of the angrier guests seemed to be lost in their desire to dance with him— even Breakfast Princess and Marlo were occupied.  
So, Finn took one for the team. He allowed himself to be pulled and dragged like a child’s toy at playtime. Not that dancing with princesses was an extraordinarily difficult task. But not being able to hang out with his mom or friends, or make sure PB was doing alright. That hurt a bit. But his mom was probably busy, and Bubblegum had Marceline to confide in. What hurt most was that he was giving up his own sense of agency. Nobody enjoyed being forced into do something. In fact, these princesses should know that better than anyone. How many times had he saved them from the Ice King or a more competent kidnapper that was trying to force them into marriage? Why was dragging him across the cramped dance floor so different?  
He decided that after the day was over, he was going to have a serious talk with all of them. For now, he’d continue to let them have their fun so long as it didn’t get too bad. But they needed to recognize that they were at fault. It was funny. So many of them were angry at Bubblegum and the humans for supposedly forcing their kingdoms into awkward diplomatic positions. Yet here they were, forcing him into awkward physical positions.  
The music stopped. The musicians were taking a short respite. That meant he could rest for a bit. Before doing so, he looked over to where his friends walked off too. Bubblegum and Marceline were smiling while Simon was delivering some sort of news. He couldn’t hear very well, but caught elder Marc’s name among a couple of other words. A sudden tap on the shoulder snapped his attention away.  
“Oh, hey mom. I thought you would be working right now.”  
“I was. But I wanted to come by and see how you were doing. Did you get to dance with anyone?”  
“That… would be an understatement.”  
“Okay. Are you enjoying your time at the settlement?”  
“Kind of? I’m happy to help out the humans and my friends. And of course, I was happy to spend time with you today. But its also been pretty stressful with the diplomatic fighting biz. It would be a lot easier if there was just a monster or some bandits or something.”  
“Sweetie, you probably already know this, but you’ll find the hardest foes in life aren’t the one’s you can just stab or fight. Often times, they’re going to be the ones you need to work and speak with every day.”  
“Well that’s depressing.”  
“Not fully. Just because they start as enemies doesn’t mean they’ll always be ones. You’re a charming, wonderful young man. I’m sure whatever problems you find with people you’ll be able to hash out in time. It just takes some getting used to.”  
“And what if those enemies try to force me to do stuff I don’t want to do? Or if they threaten someone I care about because I don’t cooperate with them? How am I supposed to hash it out with people like that?”  
“No one should be able to force you into those situations. And you shouldn’t take complete responsibility for everyone else’s safety. Your well being matters too. Of course, you should help where you can. But you shouldn’t force yourself to take everything on alone. Especially if its not your fight, or if you have people who can help you out. I wish I could say something more helpful, but there isn’t really anything else I can say.”  
“No. I think you’re right. Thanks mom.”  
“Anytime. Whoops. I don’t mean to do an impression of Martin, but I have to leave you for now. Something important just came up.”  
“Anything I can help you with?”  
“Please rest for now.”  
“Okay.”  
The Minerva bot left. Finn walked over to his friends and sat down.  
“Guys. I appreciate you pulling me out from under that pile of princesses. And I know I kind of put myself in the position without telling any of you, but I think I need to take a break from dancing with them for now.”  
“Are you okay dude? You looked pretty unhappy.” Marceline asked.  
“Yeah, I’m just tired. I kind of put myself in a position I shouldn’t have. I let myself get dragged a ton because I thought it would distract them all from interrupting or thinking about Bubblegum. I think it worked, but I can’t do it again.”  
“Finn I would never ask you to do that for me. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it- a lot- but I can handle petty anger. Especially from a bunch of other princesses.”  
“What Bonnie means is that what you did was sweet. But seriously, don’t feel obligated to do that for us. We’re used to having a good time, even if other people aren’t happy with us.”  
The group went silent. Soon, the music returned and princesses and guests began dancing again. A couple of them looked in Finn’s direction but a quick hiss and facial transformation from Marceline was all they needed to stay away.  
One figure, however, was determined. Marlo began walking towards the group in defiance of Marceline’s many unnatural faces and noises.  
“Oh, what does this bozo want?” Bubblegum mumbled.  
Marlo reached the group. Each eyed him with contempt. The wizard sighed.  
“I want a truce for now. I have no interest in starting a fight or trying to snatch Finn onto the dance floor.’  
“And why exactly should we trust you?” Simon barked.  
“Because I believe that I have a mutually beneficial offer. I am willing to step away from the opposing princesses and join your treaty with the humans. But I’ll want something in return.”  
“I can’t convince the humans to stop developing anti-magic technologies. Like I said before, I’m not influential with them.”  
“You do not need to convince them for me. I believe I can do that myself. I just need your group to get me in touch with one of their leaders. In return, I’ll sign onto the defense agreement. In fact, I’ll even recommend the grand master wizard to declare any wizard who threatens the humans to be permanently expelled from the city.”  
The group turned to Simon.  
“I can try to find elder Marc. He should point us in the right direction.”


	10. The Bet

The group left the dance and entered back into the culture flooded hallway. For a minute the group paused. The only reliable method they had to contact the elder was through a Minerva bot. Bubblegum and Simon began walking while the other members straggled behind. Marceline turned to Finn.  
“Hey do you think if you call out to your mom a bot will show up?”  
“What? I mean, I never tried that but I don’t see why it would work.”  
“Do you have any better ideas?”  
“Could you sniff him out with your vampire nose?”  
“I didn’t really bother to memorize his scent. Besides, whenever magic is around, it throws my sense of smell off, no matter how faint it may be.”  
Marlo stopped walking. He slowly turned around. He bared his teeth and stared down the vampire.  
“There is nothing wrong with my magic. I simply used it today in an altercation. And if you want me to sign onto this treaty, you’ll show me a bit more respect, non-wizard.”  
“Sure, you did buddy. But if you’re going to try to threaten me, you should try to do it effectively. Personally, I don’t really care if you sign on to this treaty or not because the only wizards, I care about don’t have an allegiance to your stupid city. And I have no problem sticking you or anyone else who attacks into an early grave. Now you better turn around before I decide to sink my teeth into your checks and drain all that red.”  
“Marceline be cool. This isn’t helping. Besides, if he signs the treaty there will be less pressure on PB.” Finn said.  
The vampire queen relaxed a bit. She pushed passed Marlo and joined Simon and PB at the front of the group.  
Marlo and Finn kept their distance from the others and walked in silence. Finn thought about attempting conversation, but there wasn’t really anything he wanted to talk with the wizard about. Finn occasionally caught Marlo glancing in his direction before hastily dropping his gaze back down at the ground. Finally, Marlo swallowed air and spoke.  
“So, you’re familiar with wizards?”  
“Yeah. I mean, I’ve fought and been friends with a bunch of them. Plus, I’ve been to Wizard City. I was even a wizard for a little while.”  
“Dear boy, I doubt you’ve seen the inside of the city. Maybe an illusion but truly not the glorious city. Only magic users can get in and its protected by a secret password. And if you were ever a wizard you would never give that power up. Nobody would, being a wizard rules!”  
“The password is literally just wizards’ rule. I’ve seen a bunch of places, like Ron James’ shop, the prison, and Bufo’s magic school. I even earned all the stars and helped save the city from a big meteor. I’m not the only one. My pal Jake gave it up too. Heck, Simon over there used to be the Ice King and hated it. I’m not lying to you dude.”  
Marlo recoiled in place and stopped walking as if he were caught on the end of a chain. Finn looked back at the wizard. While most of his mouth was hidden behind his beard, the little Finn could make out had become pencil thin. He seemed to silently repeat Bufo’s name. The wizard’s beard and entire body were shaking.  
“You mean to tell me… you casually achieved the power of a full wizard and gave it up… and that you infiltrated our magnificent city and escaped our highly guarded facility…”  
“I mean, I wouldn’t put it like that but…”  
“That’s exactly how you put it!”  
The aged wizard advanced towards Finn with his arms raised. Normally, Finn could have just punched him and ended the fight, but he didn’t want to potentially be the reason the wizard didn’t sign the treaty.  
“Dang it, looks like I’m putting myself in that position again.”  
Finn shut his eyes and readied himself for the incoming blows. Given the wizard’s age and lack of muscle, he didn’t expect them to hurt. But no blows came. Finn opened his eyes and saw the wizard was frozen in place staring above him. Finn turned around and brushed against Bubblegum’s arm.  
“Hey dillweed. If you think we’re gonna let you attack Finn and sign onto the treaty we may as well just go back to the dance now.”  
Simon placed his arm on Finn’s shoulder.  
“Like Marcy said before, you don’t need to let yourself get hit to try and make everything work out. In this case, literally.”  
“Thanks guys. But I think it was also my fault a bit. I didn’t mean to, but I think I egged him on.”  
“Finn, nothing you could have said to him should have led to such undiplomatic behavior, especially when he’s trying to sign onto the treaty.” Bubblegum said.  
“Apologize to Finn before I make you.” Marceline narrowed her eyes at the wizard.  
Marlo muttered an apology at the ground. Knowing that was as good as they would get, the group continued. Finn looked back. The elderly wizard had slowed his pace and allowed himself to loosely follow their general direction. Finn turned to Bubblegum.  
“Are you sure we should be treating him this way? I mean, don’t we want Wizard City to sign this treaty?”  
“Well, yes and no. It would be nice for them to stand with us, but we don’t need them too. With so many kingdoms already in a mutual pact, no one should risk an altercation. Wizard City doesn’t need to expand and the Grand Master wizard knows we won’t go after the city unless they started something. To be honest, they probably want to be a part of the treaty to try and stop the anti-magic tech. So, don’t let Marlo’s tough talk fool you. Right now, he needs us more than we need him.”  
“I didn’t really think about any of that. I just thought that we would want to get him away from the princesses.”  
“We do. But again, any perceived aggression on their parts will be met with a united response. So, for now things should cool down even without Marlo’s help. And I don’t think you know this, but Simon took that cultural ambassador job. That’s really going to help out the humans, and my kingdom of course.”  
“Pb, can I ask you something?”  
“Of course, Finn.”  
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but is there any truth to what Breakfast Princess and Marlo were saying earlier? About trying to expand your influence and all that?”  
Bubblegum sighed.  
“Yes and no. I want what is best for my kingdom. And for that, maintaining an alliance with the humans and a lot of other kingdoms is essential. So yes, I’m trying to expand my influence in Ooo’s politics- I always have been trying to. But, a lot of the specifics they accused me of are just paranoia. I didn’t send Lemongrab to seduce LSQ. I’m certainly not dating Marceline for political influence. And I don’t want a joint human-candy empire.”  
“That makes sense, I guess. I don’t know, politics is complicated.”  
“It is. And funnily enough, it’s also very simple right now- especially compared to 1000 years ago from what Simon has told me.”  
“Man, I don’t even want to think about that. Why can’t everyone just work together and get along. Surely it would work better for everyone?”  
“You saw Gumbald those years ago. Peeps can be paranoid or selfish. Usually both. And a lot of time, they think that sticking it out on their own will get them the best result.”  
“That’s wack.”  
“Pretty much. Rule one of foreign relations Finn, don’t try to rationalize the actions or judgements of people you’re trying to relate with. It just won’t work.”  
“Noted.”  
The group rounded the corner and shuffled into the main entrance hall. After seeing no one was inside, they exited the building. The street outside was also void of any signs of life. They walked down a couple of city blocks each equally abandoned.  
“This is certainly strange. With so few humans attending the ongoing dance, we should have run into someone by now.” Simon said.  
“Finn, I think you should try calling out for your mom. Even if she doesn’t’ come, maybe someone will hear and tell us where we could find one of her bots.” Marceline said.  
Finn looked down the street, took a deep breath, and cupped his hands to his mouth.  
“Hey mom if you can hear me can the closest you follow the sound of my voice!”  
The group waited for a couple of minutes. No Minerva bots appeared.  
“Dang it, mom.”  
“That’s okay. I have another idea, and it’ll be more fun.” Marceline smirked.  
“What are you smiling about Marceline?” Bubblegum asked.  
“Well, if we make enough noise, someone is bound to come along and tell us to shut up. We could probably get them to take us to a Minerva bot.”  
“It’s worth a shot, I guess. A lot of people should know how to find one of my mom’s copies.”  
“Or, we could go to the medical ward, where the Minerva bots work.” Simon suggested.  
“Simon’s right Marceline. Besides, who knows what kind of weirdo we might attract.” Bubblegum said.  
Marceline grumbled. Simon was right of course, but she really felt like yelling. Especially considering how formal she’d had to act today. She put her hands on her waist.  
“Let’s make it a competition then, the two of you vs Finn and me. Whichever team gets a Minerva bot first gets to give one order to each of the losers in the next 48 hours.”  
“That sounds like it could be fun.” Finn spoke up.  
“Oh, you bet it’ll be. I can see it now. I’m gonna make Bonnie sing a hardcore rock and roll song to the settlement council. And I’ll order Simon to help me play pranks on a bunch of the diplomats.”  
“Well, while you two yell at the sky, Simon and I will head to the medical ward. And when WE win, I’m going to order you to change into actual formal attire- not that slightly less aggressive punk rock outfit.” Bubblegum teased.  
“Oh, it is on Bonnie.”  
Marlo began tapping his foot. When that failed to garner the attention he wanted, he began to clear his throat with increasing ferocity. When this too failed, the elderly wizard walked between the four, and began jumping in place.  
“Are you all forgetting about someone? What am I supposed to do?  
“You can go with either team, I guess. Just don’t try to punch anyone.” Finn said.  
Marlo evaluated his options. On one side, the vampire queen was giving him a death stare. Her eyes told him that he couldn’t be alone with her, even for a minute. He turned his head. The other side looked at him with a mixture of pity and contempt, but not outright hatred. His choice was clear.  
“I’ll go with the Princess and the human ambassador.”  
As the medical ward team turned to depart, Marceline flew to Marlo leaned into his ear, making sure her words were just a hiss to everyone else around them.  
“Bonnie and Simon are literally the two people I care about most in the world. If I hear that you even looked like you thought about annoying them— let alone doing anything to them— Wizard City is going to need to clean their streets for weeks to scrub your insides off of them.”  
She backed up and looked at him. The message was received loud and clear. The wizard was trembling and she could detect the slightest hint of urine. This guy was as disgusting as he was old.  
The medical ward team rounded the corner and was out of sight. Finn turned to Marceline.  
“Alright, what noise do you wanna make to get people’s attention? I was thinking we could beatbox or sing a song.”  
“Finn don’t be a dweeb. Let Bonnie and Simon get a little farther away. Then, just do what I do.”  
The pair waited in silence for a minute. Then, Marceline hovered in the air and let out a skull shaking screech. Finn clamped his hands around his ears, but wasn’t able to drown out the noise. Tears and snot began dripping down his face. It felt like his eyes and brain were all about to pop. Then Marceline stopped.  
“Dang. Maybe there’s no one in this area. That should have gotten someone to open a window or door or something. Oh well, we can try again down the block.”  
“Marceline I can’ do that! I felt like I was gonna die from you doing that!”  
“Well duh. People hear the noise, want to shut it up so they try to find where its coming from. Then bam, we got them.”  
“No. People hear that noise, and then immediately shut down because nasty junk is leaking from all their face holes. I mean look at me!”  
“Finn, you literally always look like that.”  
“What, no I don’t!”  
“Relax, I’m just kidding around. But I see your point. Still, I don’t think beatboxing or singing is going to cut it.”  
“Well, why don’t we just yell out help or something? Someone will respond.”  
“Sure, if you want to be lame about it.”  
“Do you want to order PB and Simon around or not?”  
“Okay, okay. We’ll try it your way. But if it doesn’t get anyone, I’m gonna start screeching again.”  
The pair began yelling out for help. At first, there wasn’t any response. Seeing Marceline beginning to get over his plan, Finn became more desperate in his cries. Finally, a younger woman opened her door.  
“What are you two doing? You shouldn’t be outside right now. Especially if you’re outsiders!”  
The duo immediately stopped. Marceline flew to the woman’s door step.  
“What are you talking about lady?”  
“I shouldn’t be saying this. It isn’t my place.”  
Finn joined the two at the doorstep  
“Ma’am, I’m Minerva Campbell’s son. If there is something going on that you’re afraid of, please tell me. Also, any chance you can tell us when we can find one of the Minerva bots?”  
“Look. All I know is that there were a bunch of people who looked pretty mad near here a while ago. I didn’t see who or what they were. I just heard them complaining about some kind of treaty. Your best bet to find a Minerva bot is at the medical ward. Just get there, and get off the streets please.” The woman looked both ways, and abruptly shut the door. Finn flinched backwards.  
“Dang, looks like we lose.” Finn sighed.  
“No way dude, I can fly us across this city faster than Simon or Bonnie can walk. We’ll just cut them off.”  
“Do you even know where the medical ward is?”  
“No, but how hard could it be to find? It probably looks like a cross or her hat or something.”  
Marceline’s phone began to buzz. She took it out and answered.  
“Hey Simon, calling to admit defeat? If you give up now, I’ll consider having mercy on you.”  
“We’re at the medical ward Marcy. You two need to get here as soon as you can.”

Simon and Bubblegum rounded the corner with Marlo trailing behind like a sick dog. He kept his distance, but walked fast enough so they wouldn’t think he was trying to slow them down.  
“If memory serves from when I was helping out here last, the medical ward should only be about a five-minute walk from here.” Simon said.  
“Cool. Looks like an easy win for us then. I don’t know about you, but I look forward to giving Marceline my order. I’m not sure what I would order Finn to do though. He kind of already follows my orders.”  
“I hope she’s a good sport about it. In any case, I don’t really plan to give either of them an order. If they force me, I’d probably just have them watch a movie with me or something.”  
“Lame. You probably have like a million orders you can give to embarrass Marceline.”  
“Yeah, I suppose. Maybe I could just order her to not fly me for the next forty-eight hours. But I know the second those hours are up will be the second my feet stop touching the ground for the next forty-eight.”  
“She’s really glad to have you back. Even though its been a couple of years since you returned, she’s still always excited to see you.”  
“I could say the exact same thing about you. She mentioned that when you two dated for the first time you were practically inseparable. It looks like you’ve picked up on that again pretty fast.”  
“Our previous relationship was… complicated. I don’t know how much you she told you, but it wasn’t the definition of a healthy relationship.”  
“Oh. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”  
“Its okay. I mean, it had to happen so that we could grow as people. And if it didn’t happen, we wouldn’t be able to be as happy with each other as we are now. And like you said, we’re pretty happy now.”  
“I’m glad for that. I can see how much you love one another, and its something that is very rare in this world. And when you have that kind of love, you need to keep and cherish it. You make her happier beyond description.”  
“It means a lot to hear that. Thank you.”  
“And to tell you the truth Bonnibel, my relationship with Marcy is still pretty complicated. The last time I was, well, me, she was a little girl who I needed to protect and take care of. But when I first came back? Our roles basically reversed. I didn’t know anything about Ooo. I almost walked into man eating plants and monster lairs dozens of times. And don’t even get me started on what she must have felt like when I was the Ice King.”  
“You’re back and you’re you. To her, that’s all that matters. And take it from me, I think she likes getting to be the one who protects you, even if it seems weird at times. She certainly likes that dynamic in our relationship.”  
They reached the medical ward. The building was a pasty white color with a large red cross-shaped section used for entering and exiting. After Marlo was an appropriate distance, the trio walked into the cross, and entered a world of chaos.  
Minerva bots had formed a phalanx and were frantically shooing people away. A crowd of well-dressed individuals had formed in one corner of the room, desperately shouting questions about the health and well being of patients. Simon and Bubblegum attempted to insert-themselves in the chatter, but weren’t able to interrupt the madness.  
Finally, Simon grabbed hold of a Minerva bot who had shoved a man in a suit back into the pile of questioning bodies. She turned to him ready to do the same, but quickly relaxed.  
“I was hoping your group would show up. We have a bad situation, and it concerns all of you.”  
What happened here? Why does it concern us? Bubblegum asked.  
All of you follow me. Even the wizard.  
The Minerva unit temporarily shifted to allow the trio and their guide bot safe passage before again swallowing up the empty space. Just in time too, as multiple members of the corner-pile rushed hoping to get through.  
They followed the Minerva bot down the hallway and up a single flight of stairs. After reaching the second floor, the helper robot led them to the first room on their right. Three individuals were lying in hospital beds, each of them having three Minerva bots tending to them. The trio didn’t recognize the first two. When Simon saw the third figure, he immediately pulled out his phone.


	11. Oh Hi Marc

Marceline and Finn followed their Minerva bot guide, turned right and entered the room. Simon’s panicked call and the war-zone downstairs began to make sense. There were three patients in the grey room. Each laid on a simple bed and were hooked to a computer-tower like machine. Above each bed was a screen displaying information about the patient. The faces of the first two were unfamiliar, but the screens placed above their beds indicated why they were so important- both of them were council members. Finn recalled briefly seeing one of them. He had been forced off the end of the table to make room for Bubblegum.   
More important was the figure at the end of the room. Elder Marc laid unconscious and was surrounded by multiple Minerva bots, as well as Simon, Marlo, and Bubblegum.  
Slowly, the newcomers approached the overcrowded bedside. Two of the Minerva bots retreated to make room for them. After seeing the state of his body, Elder Marc’s attention from the Minerva bots became clear. His left arm was covered by a recently finished stitching. His nose was covered in a cast that was supported by medical tape keeping it in place above his upper lip. His lower lip was swollen leaving his mouth agape. One of his front teeth were missing, while the other was chipped. A smaller stich was over his left eye. The tip of his right ear, along with skin along his right cheek was gone. Looking farther back, there was a dent in his head above the remainder of his right ear. His right arm was elevated far above his body. Looking at the tips of his fingers, several nails were missing. After a moment of silence, Finn spoke.  
“What happened to him?”   
“He, and the two councilmembers in the other beds were attacked on the street outside of the celebration. There are currently no leads to who is responsible.” One of the Minerva bots replied.  
“He’ll be okay right?” Finn asked.  
“Well, the physical damage he sustained was heavy, but its repairable. A Skin graft for his face, some more stitching for his back, and physical therapy for his right arm will be easy enough. We’ll also have to regrow his damaged teeth, but he could just as easily use false ones. The nails may regrow, but they’ll likely be an off-color… but there’s no telling if he’ll actually wake up. Further, we haven’t had the chance to run an MRI for potential brain or spinal damage.” Minerva replied.   
“You could have just lied and told me he would be okay, mom.”  
“What that have really helped, Finn?”  
“…No. Sorry.”  
The Minerva bot put her arm on Finn’s shoulder. Bubblegum spoke up.  
“Is there anything I can do to help take care of elder Marc or the others? The Candy Kingdom has advanced medical technology as well as well-trained physicians.”  
“Thank you for your offer princess, but the technology we have at our disposal here should be more than enough. And I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I’m a pretty capable helper if I say so myself.” Minerva let out a laugh.  
“Right, sorry. I’m just upset about this. I fear that this attack was in response to the public defense declaration the kingdoms made at the ceremony.”  
The group heard the sound of multiple pairs of feet scuffle into the room. A couple of people clicked their teeth at the fallen council members before making their way to the far-end of the room. The group looked up to see council chair Wayne with a security detail.  
“I apologize for barging in like this, and for being late to the party. I wanted to come right away, but we had to create security details to safeguard the other council members.” The council chair’s eyes shifted around the room at each of the patients before letting out a sigh. Bubblegum stepped forward.  
“Council chair Wayne in light of this recent attack, I would like to pledge my kingdom’s security forces to help safeguard your people from further incident, and to help catch those responsible.”   
“Thank you, princess Bubblegum, but I would rather not activate the defense pact so swiftly. We don’t know who was responsible or if it was against the human settlement as a whole.”  
“I’m sorry? But with all due respect council chair, two of your council members as well as the man in charge of today’s events were all attacked outside of the ceremony. How could you not interpret this as an attack on the settlement?” Bubblegum replied, flabbergasted.  
Council chair Wayne walked over and shut the door to the room. He returned to the group, leaned down, and spoke in a stressed whisper.  
“I have suspicions that the attack may have been carried out by, or with the assistance of the isolationist protesters. I have no proof of this and could very well be wrong. But I don’t want to agitate the situation, or cause a panic with the guests who have recently signed the defensive treaty.”  
Simon spoke up and put his hand on Bubblegum’s shoulder.  
“Bonnibel I think he’s right to be cautious. We’ve seen the protesters ourselves; they very well could be involved. And calling upon that defense pact so early could send warning signals to some of the more hesitant kingdoms.”  
“I know, but doing nothing also seems like it will hurt. In the earlier days of the candy kingdom, If I didn’t respond to a threat immediately, it was taken as a sign of weakness.”  
“Bonnie, you’re not in the wild candy kingdom west anymore. The humans have allies. If anyone tries a full attack, we’ll be right there to help the settlement out.” Marceline said.  
“You guys are right. Council chair Wayne, I’m sorry for that outburst. I would just like to help however I can.”  
“Its quite alright. Frankly, I’m gracious you are so quick to offer aid and swift action. I am equally gracious you take wisdom from our cultural ambassador. I do think it would be best if we do it covertly.”  
“Hey I have an idea.” All heads turned to Finn.  
“Marceline, that woman said she saw a bunch of people roaming the streets. Maybe some other people saw or heard something too.”  
“If your group would go investigate, even for a little, I would be grateful. Right now, I want to devote as much man power to keeping the guests and other council members safe. But I can assign a couple of Minerva bots and seekers to help.” Council chair Wayne said.  
“Maybe we should keep it just us for now. Earlier, elder Marc told me that he feared the isolationists had influence. It’s possible they might have members among the seekers as well.” Simon replied.  
“I see. That would make sense. And do you know what Marc meant when he said influence, Simon?” The council chair asked.  
“No. He wasn’t specific. He wasn’t even sure it was a justified fear. He was just letting out some anxieties about the day to me, and that came out with them.”  
“I see. Well, its good to know and keep our eyes peeled for that sort of thing. In any case, I need to get going. It wouldn’t look good if I were spotted in the medical ward for an extended period, especially with rumors already circulating- I take it you’ve seen the downstairs?”  
“Yes, we have. And don’t worry, we won’t let you down council chair.” Finn exclaimed.  
“Wait!” Marlo screeched. For a while, everyone had forgotten the wizard was even in the room.  
“Council chair I wanted to sign Wizard City onto the agreement with the other kingdoms and humans. Now that this attack has occurred, I am unsure. I’m also unsure if I should keep this information to myself.”  
“You little—” Marceline started. The council chair cut her off.  
“I’m sure we can come to some king of agreement representative of Wizard City. There must be something the Wizards can achieve from cooperation? We can discuss it if you come with me.”  
“Of course. Finally, the respect that the representative of the Wizards deserves around here!”   
Marlo, Wayne, and the security detail exited the room. Finn peered out the window and stared at the red cross designating the medical wing’s entrance hoping to see where they were headed, but they never came into view. He felt a hand clamp on his shoulder.  
“They probably took the backway out to avoid people seeing Wayne in the medical ward. I think your group should do the same.” Minerva said.  
“Before we go, I should tell you all something.” Simon motioned for everyone to lean in.  
“I kind of lied to the council chair. Elder Marc was specifically concerned about the isolationists having some king of political influence over the council. And when he left the dance, he told me he was specifically going to try and find Wayne.”  
“Okay. So, what are you getting at, Simon?” Marceline asked.  
“I only agreed to the ambassador job to Marc, not to Wayne. Wayne knowing that information means they must have met before Marc and the others were attacked. Maybe I’m just being paranoid, but I want to keep the information in a tight circle. Just us for now.”  
“I don’t think its paranoia Simon. I know I agreed to not take action for now, but it should be in the human’s best interests to make some kind of public statement or acknowledgement. Wayne’s decision is still a bit confusing to me.” Bubblegum said.  
“Truthfully, I think both of your suggested approaches make sense. But his approach does seem a bit weird since he doesn’t need the backing of the more hesitant kingdoms right now, just the ones who already signed the agreement.” Simon narrowed his eyes.  
“I don’t mean to interrupt, but you should all get going. If you are suspicious of the council, now they know people may have heard or seen something.” Minerva suggested.  
“Ok. Finn, Marcy. Can you take us to the woman who warned you before?”  
“Of course. I’ll fly us out the window. Finn, Bonnie, take my hands. Simon, get on my back.”  
“Marcy, don’t you think Bonnibel should—”  
“Simon, how did arguing with me about carrying you end this morning?”  
Simon grumbled and put his arms around her shoulders. Marceline turned her head to him.  
“Besides, Bonnie hates riding piggyback and she'd complain the whole time. I know you'll only complain at the beginning.”


	12. Penny

Marceline touched down on the still deserted sidewalk. She pulled her hands from Finn and Bubblegum and let Simon climb off her back. Relieved of their collective weight, she stretched. Who knew flying three people at once would be so strenuous? Normally, she would have just transformed into her bat form. It would have been faster and easier to hold onto everyone. But she didn’t want to scare the settlement. At least not today anyway. She saw that Finn was leading Bubblegum and Simon to the door of the woman who warned them earlier. She hung back a bit.  
Finn let a quick succession of light knocks hit the door. After a minute with no answer, he tapped slightly harder. After another minute, he pounded against the door.  
“Hey lady can we talk to you again? It’s important!” Finn shouted.  
There was still no reply. Finn was about to knock again when Simon stopped him.  
“Finn it’s no use. She’s either not home or doesn’t intend to answer us.”  
The three moved away the doorstep and began walking towards the middle of the street. Finn looked towards Marceline. She was eyeing him with a knowing, almost taunting grin. He shuddered. No way was he going to let her try to screech again. Finn sprinted back and slammed himself against the door and began kicking at it out of sheer desperation. Bubblegum and Simon gave each other a confused look before silently deciding to stop him. Before the pair could move towards him, Marceline had dived past them laughing.  
Finn turned in time to see Marceline slam into him. Their combined weight proved too much and the door already weakened from Finn’s blows gave way. Marceline got up and dusted herself off before reaching and puling Finn up.   
“What’s the deal Marceline? Why’d you do that? Finn cried.  
“I figured you could use some extra motivation. When that got you nowhere, I lent a bit of actual muscle. Looks like it worked out.”  
“We broke into her house! Why would she help us now?”  
“No. We just happened to find the door broken down. And being the concerned heroes we are, we entered to see if she was okay. We just happened to be looking for her at the same time.”  
“Like she’d believe any of that.”  
The pair were joined by Simon and Bubblegum. Before either could voice their anger or dislike for the situation, Marceline gave Finn a light slap on the cheek.  
“Finn what have I told you a million times? Vandalism is wrong! Marceline turned hoping to have lightened the mood at least a little. Bubblegum was pinching the bridge of her nose while Simon tried to stifle back a giggle. Well, at least he wouldn’t give her an earful.  
“Really Marceline. We’re trying to conduct a subtle investigation, not announce to the world where we are.” Bubblegum sighed.  
“Hey, we need answers as fast as possible. Besides, we can replace that door. We can’t replace anyone else who gets attacked.”  
Bubblegum sighed. Marceline had a point, as poorly demonstrated as it was.  
“Well, what’s done is done I suppose. Let’s just find our potential witness.” Bubblegum said.  
“Atta girl.”   
The group split up and searched the house. The walls were all painted a light tinted green. Unlike the cultural center, no art pieces or statues decorated any of the rooms. But there was a more important concern. The house was eerily pristine. Surely, if someone was living there something would be some sign of life. Some food crumbs, a stray hair, a crumpled pillow, or a light left on. But so far, it looked more like a museum exhibit than someone’s living quarters.   
Finally, Finn called out. He stumbled upon their first sign of life.   
“Guys check it out, I found something!”  
The others followed his voice and found the white hatted young man squatting down and peering at the floor. Finn moved his head back to reveal a barely visible piece of light green wire. It ran down the length of the room and vanished camouflaged itself against the similarly colored wall.  
“What do you think it does?” Finn asked.  
“Only one way to find out. Pull that sucker!” Marceline quickly grabbed the wire and tugged.  
The wire tensed. A slight groan echoed throughout the room. The point where wire and wall met slowly parted and a narrow descending winding staircase revealed itself.  
“Secret pathway. Who would have guessed?” Simon thought outload  
“I totally called it. You can all start bowing down to me whenever you feel like.” Marceline teased.  
They proceeded down the circular stairway single-file. Finn led while Marceline stayed in the rear. Soon, they reached an iron hatch. Finn banged on it.  
“Hello? Anyone own there?”  
At first, there was no response. Finn was about to pound again before Marceline spoke up.  
“Here, I can rip it off its hinges pretty easily.”  
Before she reached the hatch, the handle began to turn. The door popped open, and the head of a familiar young woman emerged. She stuck a metal rod with a small iron nub out between the group and her body. She looked up at them terrified.   
“How did you find me down here? What do you want with me?!”  
“Easy lady. We just wanted to ask you a couple of questions. Just put that thing down and we can talk.” Finn tried to reassure her. The group backed up a bit, but spread out from their single file line.  
“We can talk, but I’m not putting my weapon down.”  
“I’m sorry, but your weapon of choice appears to be broken golf club. It wouldn’t be much use in a fight.” Bubblegum said.  
The woman directed the club towards Bubblegum.  
“That’s just what you want me to think. You want me to put down the club so I’ll be defenseless!”   
“You can keep holding the club. We won’t take it from you. But lets at least sit down somewhere to talk things out.” Simon suggested.  
The woman sighed and stepped aside. The group walked into the metal hatch and golf club protected room. Seeing that there was just one crudely made wooden rocking chair, Finn, Simon, and Bubblegum sat on the ground. Marceline floated above, periodically removing Finn’s hat and rifling through Simon and Bubblegum’s hair. The woman sat in the rocking chair. She wrapped her left arm around its arm rest but kept the club pointed at the group in her right hand. She began to swing.   
She had short brown hair and blue eyes. She wore an itchy looking white shirt with some kind of red stain near the naval along with black baggy pants with slight tears on the knee caps. She stared at the group while rocking in place.  
“You can call me Penny.”  
“Okay Penny. My name is Finn. Like I said last time we spoke, I’m Minerva’s son. You warned us before about being on the street. My friends and I need to ask you a couple of questions about what happened.”  
“I already told you. I heard a bunch of angry humans but didn’t see anything.”  
Marceline stopped combing through Bubblegum’s hair, much to the latter’s relief.   
“Hold on. Last time, you called them people, but said you didn’t know if they were humans or not.”  
“I must have misspoken.”   
Finn scooted forwards. Penny flinched but didn’t raise the gold club.  
“Penny, are you sure there isn’t anything you’re not telling us? Its really important we know everything.”  
Penny sighed. She dropped the golf club. It produced a clang that echoed throughout the room.  
“They were humans. And they weren’t random humans. By their chants, they were that isolationist group.”  
“Did you see anyone you recognized? Or anything we can use to them? Like a tattoo or facial scar or something?” Finn asked.  
“No. I didn’t get a good look at them. They came down the street and waited out in front of the big culture center for a while. Then they just all left at the same time. No police came to threaten them, no politicians asked them to stop or anything.” Penny continued.  
Maybe they were signaled? Like someone called them away? Marceline suggested  
“Maybe. There was a lot of chanting so one of them could have been called on a phone without me hearing it.”   
Bubblegum frowned. Something didn’t add up.  
“Yeah, but maybe isn’t good enough evidence. Simon sighed. “We should return to the front of the cultural center. We might find something.” He proposed.  
“Is there anything else you can remember, Penny? Literally any little detail?” Bubblegum asked.  
“I’ve already told you everything I know!”   
Bubblegum got up and walked towards the woman. She stopped and bent down in front of her and narrowed her eyes.   
“If that’s all you know, why were you hiding in this panic room with a golf club?”  
Bubblegum bore her eyes into Penny’s. The woman began to fidget in place. She darted her eyes looking for an escape but saw none. She eyed her golf club. Too far out of reach. Plus, the floating girl was probably faster. She sighed.  
“Okay. There was one thing that scared me. One or two of their group were walking around looking into buildings in this part of town. They didn’t look into mine, but I think one of them caught me staring at them before they left with the rest of their crowd. I don’t know what they were looking for.”  
“Any discerning features?” Bubblegum asked exasperated.  
“None that stand out. One was a man, the other a woman. I think they had black hair? Or, brown maybe? Definitely a darker shade.”  
Bubblegum sighed and left the panic room. Finn and Marceline quickly followed her. Simon thanked Penny for her time, handed her a bit of money and followed suit. The group walked up the staircase and out the broken door. They began heading towards the cultural center. As they moved, Marceline floated next to Bubblegum.  
“Hey, you doing okay?”  
“No. Nothing that woman said was as helpful as I would have liked.”  
“Hey. We got an eyewitness to some weird biz plus descriptions of two people to look out for. That’s something.”   
“Not really. Eyewitness testimony is pretty unreliable. Besides, you saw how nervous she was. I doubt she’d come forward with anything. They might even think we forced her to say that stuff.”  
“What? I’ve seen you put tons of peeps in jail for eyewitness testimony.”  
“Yeah, well those were mostly candy citizens. I know all of their descriptions by heart considering I made them. Plus, all of the cameras I used to have helped a ton.”  
“Well, do you think there might be any cameras near here?”  
A smile slowly cracked through Bubblegum’s look of frustration.   
“We won’t know unless we check.”


	13. Motivations

The dance wasn’t going as planned. In fact, it was a disaster. Breakfast Princess sighed. She was hoping to find some human officials to isolate and speak with. Maybe she could convince one of them to make an alliance with her kingdom. But most of the important looking humans left in a hurry when the dance was announced. Those that were left were swarmed by guest in the room. 

At first, she tried competing in the frenzy. She would tear a human away from another princess and try to dance and speak about any political concern she could think of. But she immediately ran into several problems. Most of the humans she isolated weren’t very important. A councilwoman’s aid, a musician, a painter. She even accidently stole Finn at one point. That conversation had been awkward. Then there was the fact that she knew very little about what the humans wanted or needed. Sure, the people she spoke to had their own concerns, but nothing that her kingdom could help with. The council aid had an idea of what the human leadership was concerned with. But when they began listing the immediate concerns of the leadership, she quickly found herself overwhelmed. She excused herself and sat on the sidelines.

She was a princess. She was supposed to be politically knowledgeable. But most of the breakfast kingdom’s affairs were so different than what she found here. She didn’t know anything about, nor did she have to worry about low agricultural yields or a lack of resources for building and maintaining staple human technologies. She didn’t even have advisors who were trained in economic development or risk management. She thought that diplomacy with the humans would be easy, but they didn’t even have a princess— how backwards.

More importantly, she had no idea what the human’s intentions were. Marlo was convinced they would try to split the continent with the candy kingdom. But this was a bit far-fetched. How would this small settlement come to dominate an entire continent? Even with unknown technologies, they were still horribly outnumbered. She sighed again.  
She thought she was a good princess. She hosted princess days. She always had the adoration of her people. She had a larger and better-looking kingdom than most of the others. So, why wasn’t she doing well here? It wasn’t like the other princesses were doing all that well- except for Bubblegum.

She turned her head. Bubblegum wasn’t trying to compete for the remaining humans’ attention. She was happily dancing in the corner with the vampire queen without a care in the world. Why would she care? She had been sitting up top with the council members. She had been given a private tour by that elder guy. Her girlfriend’s adoptive father had been publicly asked to represent the humans across Ooo. She didn’t need to compete with anyone, she was in a league of her own.

And she always was. The candy kingdom was the oldest, and the most advanced of Ooo’s kingdoms. Bubblegum could outmaneuver any princess politically, and between her espionage and military, could strongarm other kingdoms into agreements or backing down through the threat of force. And despite this, all of the princesses had heard what happened in the candy kingdom’s first encounter with human technology. They lost hard. Their military and defense forces were useless. Finn and Jake barley managed to put down the tech or the woman. It was a one-time vulnerability, but it was enough to show who was top of the food chain. If the candy kingdom and humans joined together, they’d be unstoppable. Other than that, the only real conflicts the candy kingdom had been in recently only served to show how untouchable the candy kingdom already was.

And before the humans arrived, everyone was okay with that. Sure, Bubblegum did shady stuff. And she did consider herself better than everyone else in the room. But she was never hostile—at least now. Many princesses heard rumors from the older candy citizens. She was supposed to have been ruthless in the past. But candy citizens weren’t the most reliable sources of information. They probably defined ruthless as her telling them to stay inside the walls of the city or something. 

Yet she still committed questionable actions. She imprisoned people for seemingly no reason. “Phony weddings” or “tax evasion” she would say. She spied on everyone she deemed as threat. The breakfast kingdom prided itself on not being one of the named kingdoms in her espionage apology. But looking back, that just showed how little of a threat the breakfast kingdom was perceived to be. Then of course were all the actions she did in the name of keeping peace. She sabotaged the fire kingdom- an event that should have led to war. But flame princess not only backed down, but became one of her closest allies! Then she was always butting heads with the wizards in rhetoric. But they still considered her a friend of their kingdom for some reason.  
She looked away from the dancing couple. She turned her head to Finn, currently being sucked under a growing dogpile of princesses. And then there was this issue. Finn was the hero of Ooo. But his loyalty was to Bubblegum. Sure, he wasn’t the most powerful person. But when you thought of hero, it was Finn’s name and face that came to mind. And he lived in and served the candy kingdom. 

Speaking of power, she turned her head back to Marceline. Emotionally, she was actually happy for them. But politically, this was a disaster. You didn’t mess with Marceline. She was probably the best fighter on the continent- a one-woman army. For a long time, she was isolated. She didn’t mess with anyone unless they bothered her. Well, that wasn’t completely true. She was a prankster but trying to stop her through force or law just got you pranked harder. And there wasn’t anything you could do about it. In any case, she was beyond politics. For the longest time, the only other monarch she was concerned with protecting was the Ice King. If the princesses tried to arrest him or steal his crown away when he was sleeping, she went livid.  
She shuddered. There was a story her mother had told her. Where an older generation of princesses did capture him. They invited him to a party. They asked him to take off his crown as part of a hat-swap. The old man eagerly accepted. Then they bound him in ropes and chains and were going to haul him off to a shared prison complex, only for Marceline to come crashing through the window. Within seconds, all of the guards were down and the Ice King freed. She took the crown and tossed it at him and left without a word. At least now everyone knew why she protected him.  
And now she might offer that same protection to the candy kingdom and potentially the human settlement. What stopped either from simply hitting the Marceline button and wiping away any resistance?  
People were on the move. Marlo walked by her- he didn’t even look at her- and was talking with Simon. Finn, Bubblegum, and Marceline were there too. Then they all left.  
What was Marlo doing? He was supposed to be her ally! Was he really defecting to Bubblegum? 

Could she blame him? Everything was over. That big defensive pact made attacking or even debating the alliance members impossible. She sulked. For a minute, she considered following them. She got up and started walking towards the door. But then she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see the councilwoman’s aid.  
“Someone important would like to speak with you.”  
Maybe this wasn’t an absolute failure. This unknown person wasn’t a princess, but they must be important if a council aid came on their behalf. She hadn’t met any important humans before. But if one was seeking her out, maybe she had some kind of leverage or reputation. A thought pierced her mind and her legs became heavy. What if this was about the protest earlier? What if this person was going to tell her to leave?  
“Breakfast Princess? Are you coming?”  
She swallowed.  
“Yes. But do you know what this meeting will be about?”  
“They didn’t say.”  
Well, an odd meeting of unknown purpose was better than knowing she was going to get kicked out. She followed the council aid out the door and down the long winding hallway. As they rounded the corner, they came face to face with a figure. She was nearly covered from head to toe and carried a red handbag. Breakfast Princess made out a few details. Green eyes, dark hair shoved under a hat, the top of a red dress. The figure’s mouth was curled into a forced smile. The aid backed away, leaving the princess and unknown figure alone.  
“Thank you for meeting with me on such short notice princess.”  
It was an odd situation, but if this was someone important, Breakfast Princess knew she needed to muster all of her social graces.  
“The pleasure is mine. I have not been able to meet many humans as of yet. May I ask your name?”  
The figure shifted their weight. The green eyes blinked in confusion. For a second, the smile turned into a grimace before quickly switching back.  
“My name, or any proper introduction isn’t important right now. But what is important is that you get some information. You’re interested in the intentions of the candy kingdom with the humans, correct?”

“Yes. I tried asking around, but no one seems to know anything.”  
“Well, I can’t promise I know anything for certain. But I have here two books. The first is from our settlement’s library. It details many events within human history, politics, exploration, and the like. The past is often a clue for future intentions.”  
The figure reached into their handbag and produced an aged brown covered book. Its author and title lost to time and erosion.  
“The second book I have is one I have not read as of yet. I procured it from Ooo’s library.”  
“How? Turtle Princess doesn’t let anyone take books from the library. Especially ones that would be that old.”  
“I was able to convince a certain… acquaintance of hers to deliver it for me. They were very happy I wanted to be their friend, even though they were already married.”  
Breakfast Princess shrugged. Not many people could convince Turtle Princess to break rules, especially library rules. But this acquaintance must be in Turtle Princess’s good graces. 

“This book is about the history of the candy kingdom. I cannot speak to its accuracy since I’m not from here. But much of it is written by previous inhabitants of the land. I’m sure you will have an easier time discerning truth from fiction or exaggeration than I, or any other human would.”

The figure produced a slightly less aged pink covered book. This book’s cover was still legible. In place of an author’s name was simply the word Canyon. 

“Please read through these. You may not like everything you see, but it is important that you learn about them. Humans can be very… unpredictable.”  
“Thank you. Is there anything I can do in return for your help?”

“You can spread the information you find in both texts. Like I said, some of it may present the humans in a less than favorable light, but it is important that Ooo’s kingdoms know human history before working with them- or deciding not to.”

The figure turned and left. Breakfast Princess stared at the two aged books for a minute before walking away. She needed to flip through them. If they could provide any insight to the current situation, they would be helpful. Maybe they would even help her understand some of the issues the humans were going through.

She left the cultural center and walked down the road. She wandered for a bit looking for somewhere to sit down and read. Most places were closed- figures. She did spot an open ice cream parlor with outdoor tables. She sat down and opened the book on human history to the table of contents. A couple of chapters were circled. She looked at these titles trying to decide a starting point between them. They read:

Settler-Colonialism in the Americas: Treaties, Conquest, and Genocide.  
Europe: 1930-1945  
The Looting Machine: How Africa was and Continues to be Pillaged by Imperialists and Kleptocrats  
Australia’s lost population: The Story of the Aboriginals  
Empires: From Rome to Mongolia to the Ottomans.  
Political Games and How to Play them


	14. The search

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter. Not a lot of time to write right now.

The team arrived outside of the cultural center. If there was a dance, or any life within the center at the moment, it sure didn’t sound like it. The group got to work. Simon, Bubblegum, and Finn searched for any clues on the ground while Marceline started looking for hidden cameras from the sky. Every so often, Finn proudly called the group over to display his latest findings. Usually, they were deemed worthless. A rock that was a different color than the rest, a patch of dirt that tasted different from “normal dirt”, or a particular piece of ground that was sending the hero suspicious vibes. But to his credit, the rest of the group was making the same amount of progress.  
What seemed like an hour had passed. Marceline had gotten bored of not finding cameras. Periodically, she would swoop down with a random item- a brick, a rock, or some poor soul’s wallet and insist it was the camera they were looking for. Her restlessness did not go unobserved.

“Geeze I’m bored.” Marceline groaned. She floated towards Finn and softly beat his head like a bongo.  
“Hey, quit it! I’m trying to work here!”  
“Right because of all the brilliant discoveries you’ve produced so far.”  
Marceline left the young man and turned to Bubblegum. Normally, distracting Bonnibel while she worked was something she learned to not do. But she had been good today, she deserved some leniency to bother her a little.  
Marceline laid back and rested her elbows on Bubblegum’s head.   
“Find anything yet?”  
“No. Have you found any hidden cameras?”

“I brought you like six of them so far. You keep dismissing my very important contributions.” Marceline started. She cleared her throat and mocked Bubblegum’s voice.  
“Marceline that’s not a camera, that’s a piece of fruit. No Marceline, that’s an apple you’ve drained the red out of.” She grinned.  
“Maybe we just have different definitions of cameras Marcy.” Bubblegum smiled. She was tired, but appreciated the attempt to make her laugh. She stopped rummaging in the ground and pecked Marceline on the cheek. Marceline got the hint.

Finally, she floated to Simon. From the corner of her eyes, she had seen him observing her. She put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a soft noogie. Before he could protest, they were interrupted.   
“Hey guys. I know I’ve been calling a ton of stuff out, but I think I’ve gotten something this time!” Finn yelled.  
“Finn, if this is another waste of time, I’m gonna pound you into next Monday.” Marceline said.  
“No, I swear this time it’s the real deal!”  
The group gathered around him. Finn held out his hands and opened them. In the left there was a green patch of cloth while in the right a single black hair.  
“See told you it was the real deal”!  
Marceline sighed. She pulled back her arm, and wacked him across the back of the head.  
“Ow! What was that for?!”  
“For wasting our time again! What’s this gonna tell us?”   
“Actually, quite a lot Marcy.” Simon spoke up. Bubblegum nodded in approval.

“Simon’s right. The settlement has a database of all the people living in it- and more importantly, their DNA. So, we should be able to cross reference the database with this piece of hair after we get it to a lab. The cloth might indicate what an attacker could have been wearing since Marc didn’t wear anything green today. At the very least, we might spot someone with a missing green patch on their clothing.” Bubblegum said.

Finn rubbed his head and looked at Marceline.   
“Guess I was wrong. Sorry Finn.”  
“Sorry isn’t going to make my head stop hurting.”  
“Don’t be such a baby, dude. I barely tapped you.”  
“Well what would you have done if the situation was reversed?”  
“Probably smack you back harder. But you’re not really in a position to do that.” Marceline grinned as she floated out of his reach.  
“Marceline as long as you’re up there mind keeping an eye out for cameras again?” Bubblegum called.  
“Peebs you know me when I'm restless. I get bored and distracted easily. I need a partner in crime to hold me accountable.” She smiled.  
“Well, I’m going to find a lab to get this stuff checked out so it won’t be me.”  
Marceline looked at Simon. Her smile widened.   
“I’m going to the lab as well Marcy. Bubblegum probably needs me for something. Right?” He turned away from Marceline.  
Bubblegum turned to him. She was about to say she would be fine by herself, but stopped. He silently pleaded, mouthing the word please at her. He did not want to be carried for the 50th time today.

“Yeah, Simon’s right. I’ll probably need him just to get permission to use the lab. You should have Finn look for cameras with you.”  
For a second, Finn smiled. He could get her back when didn’t expect it. His smile turned into a frown. She could easily just get him back in turn, or worse. He was Marceline’s friend, but he was also the only one of the three currently present who she still pranked. And knowing her, he might not convince her to resume looking for cameras that might not exist- even if it was for the settlement's safety.

“No. I think I might be more useful than Simon for getting you in PB. I’m Minerva’s son after-all. I should be able to get the humans to let us do anything we need. I could get access to the data base from my mom too. Besides, Simon and Marceline should spend some more quality time together. And he can keep her on task better.”

Marceline put her hands on her hips. So that’s how it was going to be. She thought to herself. Well, let’s see who was going to get thrown under the bus.  
“Uh, well I spent a lot of time with Marceline all week. I don’t want to suffocate her. Besides, I’ll probably get distracted while looking for cameras. But you were able to find a ton of useful things Finn.”  
Bubblegum began to snicker. Truth be told, she was hoping they wouldn’t turn on her. If Marceline’s earlier antics were an indication of how the rest of the search would go, they’d both be useless during it.  
“Finn brings up a good point Simon. Besides, we wouldn’t want to leave these two alone. Finn might be covered in bruises by the time get back. At least we know Marceline won’t hurt you for being annoying.”   
“Yeah. I’d totally try to get her back for bopping me earlier, and playing my head like a drum, and launching me through Penny’s door too. In the interest of my safety, you should be her partner Simon. Besides, like she already said, I mostly found junk today."

Marceline smiled. Messing with Finn was fun but could get old fast. Simon might give small complaints, but it was always just a game between the two. Unlike when she messed with Finn, she never intentionally did anything Simon would get upset about. Besides, her jokes wouldn’t fall on deaf ears if he was around. Especially considering parts of her sense of humor came from his. She'd have to get him back for trying to pass on spending more time with her though. 

Simon meanwhile was backed into a corner. Looking for cameras that may not exist was frankly a boring job. Even if it was with Marceline. And he hadn’t been lying- they were bound to distract each other from looking for them. Not to mention her current restlessness. At the same time, he was probably the only one who could get her to focus at the moment. And obviously he never disliked spending time with her - even when she was in a prankful mood. He sighed and smiled.

Before he could agree, he was dangling in the air. Marceline had clearly already made her choice. She flew near the top of the cultural center where she had left off, and they resumed the search. Bubblegum and Finn watched before walking back in the direction of the medical facility.


End file.
